Visitors
by Maxine101
Summary: She found herself in a world of demons and humans. Then, when she got to know a certain group of unlikely heroes, she brought them back to her place - her world.


**Part I**

I fell backward and nearly fell onto my butt before someone caught me. The man with bright green eyes and short brown hair pushed me up onto my feet and smiled politely. I turned my head at the sound of a gun being cocked and found myself face to face with the barrel of a pistol. "Strange, I thought I was on my way to the bathroom," I said.

"This isn't a bathroom," the blond man holding the gun said around a cigarette. He wore a white dress… okay; it was a yellowish robe… with a wooden Japanese-style breastplate strapped to his front and a roll of paper resting on his shoulders. He looked like he was having an aggravating day, quite a bit like the day I'd been having before this. He had beautiful amethyst eyes that at the moment radiated irritation and apparent anger.

"Yeah, I kind of noticed," I grumbled. Suddenly finding myself in alternate realities or some such like that was happening more and more frequently, and it was starting to bother me. Normally when I traveled through time and space there was an obvious cause, like a large explosion or a wormhole or _something_. These occurrences were random and without any warning whatsoever. Obviously, that wasn't the case this time. "Where am I?"

"You're in my room," the gunman stated in an irritated voice.

"Which country am I in?" I asked as I rolled my eyes. "Which city is this? What is today's date? I'll need the month, day and year."

The green eyed man and the blond exchanged mildly confused looks as the gunman lowered his arm. No matter how small the gun is, it still worried me when one was pointed directly at me like that. I've been shot often enough that I know I don't like it at all.

"Hey, Sanzo, get this stupid monkey something to eat, will ya? He's bugging the hell outa me," a man said as he burst into the room. He had red hair and eyes, which reminded me of blood red roses. When he saw me standing between the blond and brunette he stopped suddenly. "Who's this?" he asked.

"I'm Max," I said. The brown haired guy's annoyingly fake smile got a little wider. This guy was wearing a monocle and a green tunic that brought out the green of his eyes. If he hadn't been freaking lying to me with that false expression on his face I would have found him attractive.

"Hey, if you guys are busy I'll come back later," the redhead said suggestively. The one with the gun pointed it at the redhead and snarled, but the taller man seemed completely at ease, as if that gun got pointed at him a lot. Just from looking at the blonde I got the feeling he was a bit trigger-happy.

"Um, I'll leave you guys to sort out this tiff," I said and headed toward the door. The redhead moved aside to let me pass and a brown streak crashed into me, making me fall into the redhead and break the door. As I fell to the ground I kicked my feet over my head and did a flip so I would land on my feet. It was something I did completely without thinking; it was such a habitual motion. The brown streak – who was actually a teenaged-looking boy with brown hair and gold eyes – had stopped in the doorway and stared at me in open-mouthed amazement.

"Cool! How'd you do that?" he asked with excitement.

I debated briefly on weather or not to give him the technical/biological explanation on how to perform a flip of that nature using all of the technical jargon for specific muscles. Then I realized that those were all big words and I really didn't want to draw too much more attention to myself than I already had. So I simply said, "I kicked my feet over my head and landed on them."

Then I hurriedly tried to walk past the short one, but a buxom brunette woman walked past me and grabbed me by the hair. I had just cut my hair short again, so the fact that her clawed hands found purchase in my hair meant that my scalp got scraped. Then she pulled me backward toward the redhead and started brandishing me at him as she screamed. This was definitely not my day.

I'm not sure what she was yelling about exactly – the pain and irritation that I was feeling made it hard for me to concentrate on the spells that made hearing possible for me. It was more the irritation blocking my ears than anything else, actually, since I never had to concentrate on the spell which gave me back fifty percent of my hearing. "Let go, Bitch," I said forcefully as I pinched the butt that was shoved in my face. Hard.

She screamed and spun away from me, releasing my head at the same time. "I can't believe you would choose this whore over me!" she screamed as she ran down the hall, crying.

"Why'd I get attacked for something you did?" I asked half-heartedly as I checked my head for signs of blood. There was a little bit smeared on my hand and I quickly rubbed the scratch and healed it, simultaneously purifying the poison in my blood.

The redhead shrugged his shoulders and leaned back onto the doorjamb ever so casually as he said, "Hey, babe, sometimes a man's just got it."

"That doesn't mean that I have to get involved," I said.

"Allow me to heal those scratches on your head," the man in green offered.

I smiled politely, but I had already fixed up the problem discreetly. "It's fine. I'll be… what are you doing?" The man had stepped up to me as I spoke and had captured my head in his hands and was examining the sore area.

"That's strange: you're head's all healed. I could have sworn I saw blood on your hand," he mumbled.

My hand twitched because I wanted to look at the blood that was still smeared there, but I resisted the temptation. The blond one, however, grabbed my hand and raised it so that he could see. I balled my hand in a fist and raised my middle finger at him. Unfortunately, I didn't use my power to remove the blood from the finger and the golden-eyed boy saw the blood on it. Why is it that my brain always shuts off at the most inconvenient times?

"Look, there's blood there!" the short one said and pointed. I raised my other hand and flicked him off with that one. He didn't seem perturbed at all. Of course, he probably was on the receiving end of worse gestures than this one on a daily basis with these men than he was likely to receive from me… unless things got really bad. I am completely fluent in over fifty languages – reading, writing, and speaking. I can speak another two hundred, and I can swear in seventy more. I am the master of invective if the mood ever strikes me.

The blond one cocked his gun at me and snapped, "Who the hell are you?"

"Quit pointing that thing at me," I ordered, glaring past the pistol and meeting his purple gaze with my most fierce and commanding expression. We maintained eye contact for several long seconds before he lowered his gun. "What can I call you?" I asked quietly, yet forcefully. His friends looked surprised that he had submitted to my order. I'm used to ordering tough guys around, though. I usually get my way.

"Genjyo Sanzo," he said with rebellion in his eyes. This one was not going to comply with my will for very long unless I gave him a very good reason to.

I turned my head to the boy with golden eyes and asked him kindly, "And who are you?"

He smiled brightly and said, "I'm Son Goku!"

I looked at the one with green eyes and sighed. "You must be Cho Hakkai and this guy here," I pointed at the redhead, "is Sha Gojyo, right?" Their surprised looks were enough of a confirmation to irritate me more. "Why does this kind of thing always happen to me?" I asked the world in general. "How is it that I found myself in the world of Saiyuki?"

**Part II**

"Do you know us?" Hakkai asked politely. His false cheer was starting to grate on my nerves. If he kept it up for too much longer I was going to get a headache.

I snorted. "I've heard stories," I said. It was true. My son, Hai, liked reading manga and watching anime, and Saiyuki was one of his favorite series. I liked anime and manga, too, but I didn't have as much time to kill as he did.

But the best part of my statement was that they interpreted it differently than the way I meant it. They thought that I'd heard rumors, which was pretty normal. Everyone in this world had heard about their quest to India in order to prevent the resurrection of an evil demon named Gyumaoh.

There was a long silence that I allowed to stretch out and become awkward. Then I broke it by saying, "Well, excuse me." Then I turned on my heel and tried to leave again, but Gojyo was standing directly behind me and I accidentally knocked him to the ground.

"Ouch! That hurt!" he said.

"I'm sorry," I said quickly as I held out my hand to help him up. Unlike most girls I actually helped to pull him to his feet. He stared at me in surprise.

"Damn, lady, you're strong," he said. At this point I was getting very irritated, so I pushed past him and headed for the door. Gojyo reached for my shoulder, but his grip wasn't strong enough to stop me. Goku was probably the only one in the entire town with strength enough to make me pause, but since I'm pretty clever I doubted he would be a challenge.

As I passed by him he grabbed my shoulder firmly and pulled back. My feet kept moving and I bent over backward, making my body into a bridge. Then I kicked my feet up and slammed them down in front of me. Goku had bent forward to keep his hand on my shoulder – my movements had been very fast and he hadn't reacted to them – so when my feet came down they pummeled him in the shoulders.

Sanzo's gun was pointed at me again as I straightened up, my feet right next to Goku's head. I turned my head and gave him my best evil-death-glare as I looked at his aura for the first time. There was a certain amount of possessiveness in the colors surrounding his body, and I realized that in hurting Goku I had harmed something precious to the monk. The pistol pointed between my eyes was a special banishing gun that could turn a demon to dust in just one shot. Although I realized that I'm tougher to kill than most demons, those bullets would hurt so much more than normal ones. I also didn't know if I could block them. At this distance I didn't have enough time to dodge.

I suddenly broke into a wide, friendly grin and picked Goku up. He wasn't hurt badly, but his shoulders would probably have foot-shaped bruises on them within a few minutes. "I'm sorry about that," I said gently. "You took me by surprise. Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," Goku answered.

"That's good. Take off your shirt for me, please?" I asked politely, adding more sugary ooze than was normally found in pancake syrup. Be warned: never mess with me when I'm having a truly bad day.

"What?" the men around me all asked at once.

Gojyo threw an arm around my shoulders and gently leaned on me in a subtle attempt at moving me away from Goku. I planted my feet and refused to move. The redhead was the sensual one, born from the taboo union between a human and a demon. From what Hai had said, any subtleties Gojyo used were sexual in nature. "Hey, babe, if you want to see someone naked, why not me?" he offered softly in my ear.

"Right now I'm mimicking the monk in my general attitude," I snapped. Genjyo Sanzo was a very high-ranking Buddhist monk who carried a special sutra, which he carried like a shawl on his shoulders. He was known for his bad attitude. "I'm having a really crappy day. I'm lost. I'm hungry. I have a headache. You guys are detaining me from leaving here and figuring out what is going on. Here is the big difference between me and Sanzo: I don't carry a gun. I have weapons like you. I can manipulate 'chi' like Hakkai. I'm strong like Goku. If you want to take me on then you had better gang up on me and prepare for the fight of your life, although I would prefer it if you would just let me leave."

Gojyo removed his arm from around my shoulder. I speared Goku with a stern look and ordered, "Strip." He did.

I looked at where I'd hit him on his shoulders. There was a faint discoloration that was quickly swelling, so I closed my eyes as I placed my hand on the abused flesh. I pulled a few drops of power from my core, moved them through my arm and pushed them into Goku's skin, forcing his cells to regenerate themselves. The swelling went down and the discoloration disappeared. "How does that feel?" I asked gently. Using my magic always made me feel a little better when I was scared.

"It's like you never hit me!" Goku said, impressed. He turned to Hakkai and said, "She's just as good as you!"

I smiled at the compliment and stood up. There was a flash from outside the window and I turned in time to see a streak of lightning disappear in the distance. Rain was heavy in the air outside and dark clouds hung ominously low. I noticed the suddenly pensive looks that Goku and Gojyo were shooting at the suddenly pensive Sanzo and Hakkai. I sighed loudly to gather their attention and laced my fingers behind the back of my head. "I'm going onto the roof to dance in the rain and possibly get electrocuted. Join if you want!"

I expected nothing.

**Part III**

I was sitting in the rain and looking up in the sky. Water is my favorite of the four elements that I command. That's probably because it's the one that I was actually taught to use, so I had bonded to it long before I figured the others out. I held out my hand and gathered a ball of water in my palm. With a practiced flick of my wrist the water started flowing in figure eights around my wrist as if it were a snake.

"I wish Sanzo would come out here and see this. You're beautiful in the rain," Goku said with wonder in his voice. I pushed the rain away so that it trickled down an invisible shield and patted my hand on the patch of roof next to me. Goku came and sat down beside me while looking up at the water in amazement.

"I gather Sanzo doesn't like the rain," I said gently. This guy would probably spill his guts for a Popsicle – or a simple water show.

"He never said why, but he always gets so gloomy when it rains," the little guy said sadly.

"Does he get gloomy when he's near rivers and lakes and stuff?" I asked, gently probing for information. "I'll bet he looks kind of funny swimming."

"He doesn't like rivers," Goku said as he watched the rain slide down my invisible barrier. "Whenever we have to cross one and there isn't a bridge he makes us go the long way until we find one."

"How strange," I said. "What about Hakkai? He doesn't like rain, either."

"He killed a thousand demons to save his wife, and then she killed herself with his knife. If you bathe in the blood of a thousand demons you become one yourself." As Goku spoke he seemed to notice what he was saying and his eyes widened. "I'm not supposed to tell you that!" he shrieked and backed away from me a little.

I smiled sweetly and consciously relaxed my shoulders. It sounded to me like both men had suffered severe trauma in their pasts that made them hate the rain. Hydrophobic people tended to fear water and avoid it the way Sanzo did, but they wouldn't get into a depressive funk so long as they were inside when it was pouring.

"Oh, whatever. It's too late now. Guess what I figured out how to do!" I said excitedly. I held out my right hand and touched a little trickle of water. Where I touched turned the little stream of water green, and in a circular pattern all of the water started turning into different bright colors. I tried to pattern the colors into interesting designs, but I didn't yet have enough control over the spell to make it happen. A bright purple dragon would have cheered Goku right up, I figured.

We sat in silence watching the rain for a little bit. Then Gojyo came out onto the roof and told Goku that if he didn't hurry he would miss his lunch. With a start Goku jumped up and ran through the doorway. I followed more slowly, dusting off my bottom.

"Don't worry about what Goku told me," I said. "I won't tell anybody else."

"The little monkey doesn't know when to keep his mouth shut," Gojyo groused. I chuckled into my hand and allowed my shield to shrink as I turned to go back inside.

"Sometimes trusting people is a good thing," I said. "He clearly trusts you and the other two. Hell, you trust them all as well. I'd say you have a good working relationship."

Gojyo shrugged, but didn't say anything. I just walked down the steps into the inn and retraced my steps back to Sanzo's room. As I reached for the doorknob Gojyo's hand reached out and stopped mine. "What are you doing?" he asked.

"Everyone deserves to be able to dance in the rain," I said casually as I pushed past him and opened the door. Sanzo was sitting on his bed staring out the window. His knee was pulled up to his chest and he leaned on it as he brought a cigarette up to his lips. I walked up to him and was surprised that he didn't pull his gun on me. "Come dance with me," I said in a soft voice.

Sanzo looked at me for a brief moment as if I had sprouted antennae on my forehead before turning back to the window with a firm, "No."

"If I recall correctly," I said softly, "I did not ask you a question."

I stepped forward and Sanzo's gun was pointed at me just as I had expected. Without missing a step I pinched the sides of the gun barrel and the metal bent easily under my touch. I deftly pulled the gun from Sanzo's fingers with my left hand as my right hand snaked around his waist and heaved him up over my shoulder.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Gojyo asked loudly.

Hakkai had heard our commotion from the room next door and had come to investigate. As I passed him in the hallway I grabbed his right ear with my left hand and pulled, saying, "You're going to come with me, too."

"What? Where? Why?" Hakkai asked.

"Water is the healing element," I said briskly as I quick marched up the stairs and onto the roof. "It is a symbol of cleansing, purity, and femininity, although I don't know why girls are linked to water. It probably has something to do with menstruation and our monthly cycles. Either way, it really doesn't matter. Water is the calming element that ebbs and flows… I'm sure you can think up better water imagery than I can, so I'll stop it now. I hate poetry."

"Put me down!" Sanzo groused.

"I'll drop you face down on the stairs if you want," I offered. "Just think of it this way: I'm a busybody who wants something. Would it kill you to indulge me just once?"

There was a gurgle that came from Hakkai's stomach, and mine answered back. I paused on the last stair before I used my power to open the door to the roof. I shoved the rain aside again and set Sanzo down on the dry rooftop. Releasing Hakkai I reached in my back pocket for the little purple compact mirror that I carried around. I opened it and stared into the magnifying mirror, searching for something specific, before I turned it toward the ground and Called out my picnic supplies.

"Where did that shit come from?" Sanzo asked, clearly freaked out a little. Without speaking I quickly spread out the blanket and set out enough food for an army of five.

"This is amazing," Hakkai said as he inspected the streaks of rain that were not falling on his head. "How did you ever figure out how to do it?"

I shrugged. "I read about something like this in a novel I read a few years ago and copied it, using bits and pieces of what I'd learned when I was part of the Mage's guild of the Sea. I joined the guild on my seventh birthday, like all good little mermaid girls do."

"You're a mermaid?" Hakkai asked.

"Partly," I said. "My blood is very mixed. Gojyo, could you please bring Goku up here?"

"Uh, sure." Gojyo left us to sit in uncomfortable silence. Now that I had them, I wasn't entirely sure which tactic I should use to loosen them up.

"I hate the cold," I said suddenly, shocking both Hakkai and Sanzo out of their reveries. "When I was four I was chained to the wall in the dungeon at the top of a castle keep, and then shot through the palms of both of my hands. The castle was from the middle ages and had been left in ruin for a thousand years, so there was nothing in the windows to keep out the snow. I was abandoned from about nine that night until around noon the next morning when some archeologists were searching the ruins for artifacts and found me. The chains had cut off the circulation in my hands, so there was no danger of bleeding to death, but hypothermia had started to set in. Because I'm a mermaid I can't freeze, but without enough salt surrounding me my body temperature can drop to unhealthy levels." I removed the glove from my right hand and looked at the scar that was still there, both on the palm and the back of my hand. "I've hated the cold ever since."

I turned to look at Sanzo, making sure that my brown eyes captured that violent purple gaze. "But when I see the snow I make sure to lie in it and make a snow angel. That's why I want the two of you to dance with me in the rain."

**Part IV**

Just as Hakkai took a step toward me Gojyo threw Goku through the door. Goku flailed, but landed on his feet in time to spin around and start yelling at Gojyo about how he was hungry. I took a step to my left so that I was suddenly in Goku's line of vision and cleared my throat to get the shorter boy's attention. "I have food prepared right here," I said. "I wonder what the surprise is inside."

"Surprise?" Goku asked excitedly. I smiled and nodded as I sat down next to the nearest plate. I opened the basket and pulled out a huge Tupperware container of barbecue chicken. I had ten baskets like this one each with different kinds of food already prepared. Each basket could feed one meal to ten people, although in this case I figured that the amount would be barely sufficient. I normally saved the food for emergencies, but I figured that I aught to play nice with these people before I found myself in a sticky situation.

"Jason always hides something in my baskets whenever my aunt makes them up. Sometimes they're action figures, and sometimes they're flowers. Once Aunt Martha caught him trying to sneak in a spider, so ever since then he only gets to put in pre-approved surprises." I smiled a genuine smile as I remembered the incident.

"Is Jason your boyfriend?" Gojyo asked as I dished out chicken, grilled potatoes, fruit salad, and chips onto everyone's plates. I handed him his as I snorted.

"He's my son," I said.

There was a long stretch of silence. Gojyo opened the lid to the basket and looked inside, pulling out a twelve pack of root beer. "No wonder there's only fake beer in here," he said. If that was the reason Gojyo wanted to explain away the lack of booze with, it was fine by me. I wasn't asking them for their secrets because I didn't want to tell them mine. My explanations usually take a very long time to get through.

"You have a son?" Hakkai asked in surprise.

"I have three," I said simply. "Troy is sixteen, Hai is thirteen, and Jason in eleven."

"Damn," Gojyo said. "How old are you?"

"I'm twenty-two," I said with a chuckle. "I adopted all three of them. I suppose you'd say it's the human version of taking in stray cats."

We ate in silence. Goku ate enough for five people and we ate the rest. It took a lot of cajoling and some threatening, but even Sanzo and Hakkai grudgingly piled food in their mouths, chewed, and swallowed, despite not having much of an apatite. Goku wanted to steal the food off of Gojyo's plate, but every time he tried to reach over I smacked his hand lightly. After four attempts he gave up.

After a while I started to keep up a steady stream of chatter, talking about my kids and My Dance Troupe. Then, as we each finished our food I explained about a series of four magical dances, one dance connected to each element.

"The dances were choreographed eons ago, and there are so many variations that it isn't even funny. I'd guess that the version I know is closest to the original because a goddess of art taught it to me – but she's a bit of a bimbo, so I always take what she says with a grain of salt. Anyway, the dances were never officially put to music, and are traditionally danced in silence, but I found a piece of music that actually fits the Water Dance."

I stood up and walked out into the rain. I gently gathered the falling droplets into two balls at the palms of my hands and gracefully arranged myself into the starting pose. Then I started the music I had chosen – "They Live in You" from The Lion King – and started the water swirling around myself as I moved gracefully through the steps of the dance.

"Night, and the spirit of life, calling." I spun around on my toes and bowed to the men sitting on the blanket before me.

"And a voice with the fear of a child asking." I made a motion, calling more water into my hands and spreading them wide, the water following in trails behind my hands.

"Wait, there's no mountain too great." I started walking in a slow circle with my hands close together, the water spiraling upward around my body.

"Hear these words and have faith." I finished my circle and brought my arms in, collecting all of the water that I could into a small ball held close to my chest.

"Oh, have faith." I allowed my magic to fill the water so much that the water started to glow a bright blue that matched the color of my magic just as I sang the word "faith."

"They live in you." I started spinning and traveling to my right, the ball of empowered light split into three streams that swept around my body in three different directions, catching the rain that fell on them. The rain that wasn't caught looked like curtains of glittering fabric that swept around my body as I danced.

"They live in me." I started spinning in the opposite direction, the water following my every move as if it were clothing that I was wearing.

"They're watching over." I did a quick spin and stopped moving, my arms held out in front of me with the bright ball of glowing water.

"Everything we see." I raised the ball above my head and slowly split the water into three balls.

"In every creature." The three balls elongated into streams that swirled down my arms and back and gathered around my waist.

"In every star." I lifted my right foot to knee height and then straightened it so that my foot was above my head to the side. The water flowed so that it balled up at my pointed toes.

"In your reflection." I switched my position around so that I faced sideways and my foot was behind me. The water split back into three balls that started circling one another.

"They live in you." The balls of glowing water grew to the size of soccer balls and started circling my waist as I lowered my foot and pointed it in front of me while I went to face the other direction. My right arm was above my head, collecting a fourth ball of glowing water, and my left hand was resting gently on my waist. I waited there through a temporary lull in the music, but burst into a flurry of movement when the song gained momentum.

"They live in you!" I started doing a series very complicated jumps, spins, and flips.

"They live in me!" The water flowed around me as though it were keeping me in the air.

"They're watching over!" It was almost as if I were swimming, touching on the ground only to launch myself into the flow of water again.

"Everything we see!" The water was around me.

"In every creature!" I lowered the glow of the water, but not very much.

"In every star!" The glow dimmed more, taking on a more sparkling hue, shining off my hair and eyes, making me look as if a spotlight had found me.

"In your reflection!" I moved most of the water into a solid sheet behind me so that my shadow could be seen. The rest still swirled, changing color from blue to purple to green.

"They live in you!" I landed on the ground with my knees bent, my arms held out as if I were offering the others a tray. The water pooled between my hands and started raining on the ground around me. A bright blue light spread from me and into the others, dimming as the music faded into silence.

It was quiet for a very long time as the calming joy of the dance faded. No one wanted to break the spell I had cast with ugly words, but staying still for too long was very difficult. After about a minute I straightened up and walked over to the others. I started gathering up the dirty plates and putting everything away.

That is when lightning decided to strike. Since the inn was the tallest building in town, naturally the lightning was going to strike us. Before the others could get hurt I stood up straight and tall so the strong electrical charge hit me at full force.

**Part V**

I am a mermaid. I am a mage with powers strongly connected to Earth's elements. I am a freaking demigoddess, for crying out loud! A bolt of lightning isn't a danger for me at all. In fact, all I had to do was absorb the electrical currents and my body would automatically convert the power into magical energy, filling up my used reserves instantly. The little bit of electricity that I couldn't absorb remained in my hair, frizzing it with static. The lightning bolt disappeared around me as if it had never been there.

The guys stared at me as if I had sprouted bunny ears and started shouting "I'm late for a very important date." I smiled at them, hiding my irritation, and said, "Hey, if I have power over water, why wouldn't I have power over electricity?"

Sanzo was the first one to recover from amazement. "Tch," he said as he crossed his arms. I reached into my back pocket and produced his gun, the barrel still bent. I moved the pointer finger of my right hand in a circle at the tip of the barrel, returning it to its normal round shape before offering it to the wannabe annoyed monk. He took it without looking me in the eyes.

Figuring I had overstayed my welcome I swept up the picnic with a quick spell and returned it to its place inside my compact mirror. I powered the water banishing spell so that it would hold for another thirty minutes before I headed back toward the door.

All at once Gojyo was behind me, patting my hair down in the back. I turned too suddenly for him to react, so for a couple of seconds he was patting my forehead as if I were a puppy. I glared up at him for a couple of heartbeats, and when he slowed (realizing what he was doing) I snapped, "What the hell are you petting me for?"

He shrugged and leaned in the doorway, his hands on his hips. "I thought you were as cute as a cat," he said as he lit a cigarette. It bugs me when people talk with smokes between their teeth. The cancer stick bobs annoyingly and they never enunciate anything clearly, making it hard for me to understand them. Being deaf sucks.

That's why I took the smoke out of his mouth and handed it to him. "Anti-smoking: there are cooler ways to die," I said. Then I went inside and down the stairs.

Well, this was just brilliant. I wasn't tired any more, but my tension headache was raging at full force. I still had no idea where I was in the grand scheme of things; I had no money, nowhere to go and nothing to do. Whenever bad things happened I always danced in an attempt to make myself feel better. Having already done that and failed, I figured that I may as well find an overhang and start palm reading for strangers. My food wouldn't last forever, and eventually sleeping in a bed would be nice. Money is always a good thing to have.

As I turned the door handle a gentle voice called out behind me. "Max, where are you going?" Hakkai asked as if he were simply curious.

I turned and smiled. "I have no clue," I admitted. "But I need space."

"Why?" Hakkai asked. Sanzo, Goku, and Gojyo came out of the stairway behind him.

"The Water Dance is a restorative spell," I said. "It heals the body and balances its chemicals, which leaves the patient feeling better emotionally. One of the side effects is a temporary obsession with the mage who cast the spell. Even if I did know how long I'd be able to hang around I wouldn't put you through that kind of cruelty."

Hakkai smiled, and for once it was genuine. "You're actually quite nice," he said.

I looked at him, surprised. Then I realized it: in the hour or so that I'd known these people I'd acted like a bitch. Normally I'm better at putting on a friendly face and using my brain to think two or three steps ahead of the people around me in order to get a bed and a free meal or two. Man, I was off my game. "What's wrong with that?" I asked him.

He smiled wider. "We were thinking that you could come and stay with us in our room tonight."

"Don't you have a couple of rooms?" I asked. Hakkai had come out of the room next door to Sanzo's room earlier. "Although staying in two rooms at once is possible, it isn't exactly comfortable."

"I meant you can stay in mine," Hakkai said. "I won't do anything to you."

The others stared at Hakkai as if he'd grown horns. I gathered that normally he didn't act like this. I patted his shoulder and opened the door. "I'll come back in three hours. We'll see if you still feel so charitable." I glanced at the others as I left, thinking that when the spell wore off Gojyo and Goku probably wouldn't mind my company. As it was, Sanzo wasn't going to admit that he liked me, let alone when he was back to normal. I wondered what he would think once the effects of the Water Dance wore off. So far, he was the one I liked the most. He was also the one I understood the least. He wasn't mysterious by any means, but… I don't know. I always seem to make good friends with the strong silent type with chips on their shoulders. (Let's just ignore the fact that my three best friends are goofy goobers who never shut up, even when they're dying.)

I walked around for two and a half hours in the rain. Then I sat on a bench for about twenty minutes. By then the rain had stopped, but the trees were still dripping enough water that it looked as if God was still peeing on the world. A few drops landed on my head and I flicked off the tree. The tree hadn't done anything to me, but the petty indulgence made me feel better… okay, to be honest it made me feel like a retarded ten-year-old.

By the time I got back to the inn I was soaked to the skin and shivering violently. All mutant powers have a physical downside. Mine had a couple: sometimes I was too strong, and I suffered from extreme hot and cold flashes. That's what you get for being such a big freak of nature. That's what you get for having extreme physical strength and the ability to manipulate heat.

I entered the lobby and realized how awful I looked because the woman behind the desk immediately steered me in the direction of the hearth. I didn't bother fighting her because I was just that damn cold. It reeeeeeally wasn't turning out to be my day. Nothing was going right at all. These days don't happen often, but usually their repercussions were incredibly and undeniably negative.

Goku came running into the lounge closely followed by Gojyo, who seemed to have slowed his pace at the doorway in a juvenile attempt to look more dignified than his shorter friend. Apparently the receptionist had told them about my arrival before she went to get me some towels because she followed them into the room after a minute with a stack of the white fluffy cloths. She took the top one off of the stack and started roughly drying my hair.

The whole time Goku had been telling me how worried they all had been about me. It wasn't particularly shocking news, since all four of them were actually very nice men (beneath the rough and gruff walls they had built around themselves, that is).

But the shock came when Sanzo and Hakkai finally entered the room, and I heard Sanzo say, "Shut it, Hakkai, she's sleeping in my room tonight and that's final."

**Part VI**

Sanzo stared at the sleeping girl in the other bed. He was amazed at her ability to distract him so that she could change clothes in the same room as him and he didn't notice the change until several minutes later.

"Quit being amazed," Max said suddenly, shocking Sanzo out of his reverie. "I feel more comfortable with you when you're grouchy."

"Tch," he said. He reached for a smoke, but the carton wasn't there. "What did you do with my cigarettes?" he demanded.

"They're bad for you," was all she said. Sanzo shot a glare at her, realizing as he did so that her back was to him and it was too dark to see anything more than shadows in the darkness. "Besides, weren't you expecting something like this from me?"

Sanzo sighed silently. "I have no expectations."

"That's bull," Max said. "I can hear it in your voice. I'll bet you think I'm the biggest busybody in the world and you wonder why you're putting up with me."

"I didn't think you were this self-conscious," Sanzo muttered under his breath. He felt a small breeze at his mouth as he spoke and his words were suddenly very loud in his ears.

There was a long minute of silence as Sanzo pondered about the air before Max spoke. "I'll bet that Gojyo is listening hard through the wall for sounds of sex."

Sanzo tried to see Max in the dark, wondering what she was getting at. "That sounds like something he'd do."

"Hakkai is probably watching him and laughing his ass off silently. He can see pretty well in the dark."

That stopped Sanzo. "How do you know that?"

"He isn't human any more," Max said. "He is something… similar… to what Goku is. He was the same as you when he was born, but he isn't anymore. It's almost like he's Gojyo."

"Hakkai is nothing like Gojyo," Sanzo said.

"Well, in a roundabout sort of way they're both mixed-breeds. Well, Gojyo is half human and half demon, right? Hakkai was born human and turned into a demon. They both exist in both worlds and are truly part of neither."

"How do you know all this?" Sanzo asked, reaching for his gun. It wasn't where he had left it. "Where's my gun?"

"I put it in the drawer of the nightstand," she said. "I didn't want to turn over in my sleep and wake up shot."

Sanzo pulled open the drawer and reached in, feeling the familiar handle of his gun. "How the hell do you know so much about us?" he asked suspiciously.

Max was quiet for several moments before she didn't answer his question. "What do you know about me?" she asked instead.

"What?" Sanzo asked, surprised. It wasn't what he was expecting. He pulled his hand out of the drawer and closed it, his gun still inside.

"What do you know about me?" What information have you gathered about me that you know is true, but I never told you?"

"Why do you want to know that?" Sanzo asked.

He could hear Max shift around on her bed. "I'm curious. I always assume that people can read me the way I read them, but they usually can't. I just want to know what you see when you look at me."

Sanzo thought about it for a long time when he finally spoke – although he couldn't figure out why he was indulging in this conversation. He hoped he wasn't waking Max from sleep. "I know you are a young woman. You're very idealistic, but you apply those ideals to real life, and it seems to work. You're tough. I don't think we could kill you if we tried."

"You got all of that from the way I behave," Max said with a mumble. "I always keep an eye on a person's aura if I can't read their body language. It tells me what a person is and not who they are, but it makes it easier for me to keep track of their emotions. It tells me that you are male, human, homosexual, and you aren't a virgin. You aren't in pain and emotionally you're pretty neutral at the moment. You are also lying on your back."

"You can tell from my aura that I'm lying on my back?" Sanzo asked, a little paranoid.

"Your aura is a glowing light around you. I can see your silhouette in the middle. I suppose that's cheating, though. Anyway, I can also see your relationships with other people when you're with them."

A thrill of fear ran down Sanzo's back. "What can you…" he started before he caught himself. He groaned, frustrated with his loss of self control for the first time in his life.

There was a distinct smile in Max's voice as she spoke. "I can really only see compatibility. The more compatible you are with someone, plus your emotions when you are dealing with someone, plus the way you behave around that person, equals your relationship with that person. For example…"

"I don't need an example," Sanzo snapped. He was afraid of her – she saw way more than she needed to, and he was worried that she'd reveal everything, breaking through the walls he had built within himself and bearing his soul to the world.

"For example," Max insisted, "My brother Dan was very compatible with this girl. When he was around her his emotional state was jumpy – he'd go from happy to frustrated to annoyed and back to happy constantly. For the longest time they only ever fought, bickered, and griped at each other. I told him one day to just ask her out already and give my headache a rest. They've been married now for four years, and Debbie is pregnant and ready to kill Dan for knocking her up… at least she was going to the last time I saw her. She'd just found out she was going to have twins, which is a genetic trait that runs in my mom's side of the family."

Sanzo couldn't care less, except he found it interesting that Max had a brother. Why the hell was she telling him all this?

"So…" Max said loudly, and then her voice quieted down to just above a whisper. "You're homosexual, not a virgin, compatible with Hakkai, attracted to Hakkai, and pretending to be indifferent to Hakkai. Why did you use me to kick Goku out of your room instead of the man you love?"

Sanzo's heart nearly stopped and he had to struggle to breathe. "What the hell are you accusing me of?" he demanded at a shout.

"Calm down! The others can hear you through the wall!"

"I don't fucking care!" he shouted. He stopped abruptly when he heard Max laughing.

"I'm sorry I embarrassed you," she apologized between giggles. "If you want Hakkai, why not just change rooms with Gojyo? He'll complain, but he'll understand if you say that Goku is bugging you."

That wasn't the problem. Hakkai – gentle, snarky, kind Hakkai – had never expressed interest in Sanzo. Hakkai was still in love with Kannan, his dead wife, even though three years had already passed.

"Get out," Sanzo said to Max.

"No," she said with a giggle.

"Get out," he said again.

There was a brief hesitation before Max said, "No take-backs. You said you wanted me to sleep with you in your room. I realize you just didn't want me in Hakkai's room and were jealous, but you can't take back what you said. Sorry, Hon, but you're stuck with me."

Sanzo debated reaching for his gun but realized that Max would have time to counter his attack before he could even threaten her. He'd had the gun in his hand before and she was able to rush up to him and pinch his gun barrel closed before he could fire. For he first time he realized what a dangerous position he was in.

"Of course, I can always go next door, tell them we got into a tiff and send Hakkai in here so you can finally do the bump and grind that you've been yearning for," Max said musingly.

"DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE!" Sanzo roared.

"WILL YOU SHUT UP?" Max shouted back even louder than Sanzo. "The others are going to come here and ask why you're shouting and you'll have to explain this conversation… or you'll sit there and pout while I do. I hate lying."

"Tch." Sanzo's hand reached down between the bed and the wall and found his cigarettes. Apparently they had fallen there a while ago. He grabbed the lighter off the nightstand and lit up. He waited for a long time, but Max didn't say anything. "Aren't you going to take my smokes away?"

Max sighed. "I actually don't care if you and Gojyo smoke except that you're slowly killing yourselves. It's none of my business, really, but I'm a busybody. Besides, playing with you is fun."

"Playing?" She was playing with him?

When she responded she sounded contrite and a little embarrassed. "Yeah, I'm awful. To be honest, I hate it when people lie, but I lie a lot in order to keep myself and others safe. Because of this, when I detect someone else is lying I don't say anything – unless the lie is a harmful one, of course."

"Then why are you butting into my business?" Sanzo demanded.

Max responded immediately. "Not everything that is harmful will harm the body."

**Part VII**

Gojyo glanced up as Max and Sanzo came down to breakfast. Max looked exactly the same as she had the day before: her short brown hair was disheveled, she wore no makeup on her roundish face and her maroon shirt and black slacks were rumpled as if she had slept in them. She seemed to be quite… chipper, though. It was almost as if the previous day had never happened to her.

Sanzo, on the other hand, looked grouchy as hell. He tried to push past Max and sit down before her, but as he passed her she reached out and poked his side. The most esteemed monk jumped about two feet in the air and a high-pitched grunt escaped his lips. Max smiled and positively nose-dived into the seat next to Gojyo. Sanzo glared at her before taking the seat between her and Hakkai.

"I see that you two had a good night," Hakkai said sarcastically with a smile. Goku had passed out the minute his head hit the pillow, but Hakkai and Gojyo had sat up talking for a long time. Gojyo had been sitting by the wall that his room had shared with theirs, listening for any noises that would prove that the monk knew how to have fun and instead heard things like, "Don't you fucking dare!" and "Will you shut up?" He and Hakkai had debated going over there and banging on the door, shouting for them to shut up while having sex, but he had the feeling that he'd end up eating lead.

Sanzo shot Hakkai a glare, but Max smiled a beautiful smile that lit her whole face. She said, "Well, Sanzo tossed and turned for hours until I started singing lullabies one after another. Eventually he managed to pass out from exhaustion. I always sleep like the dead."

Gojyo draped his arm around the back of Max's chair and leaned in close. "Well, that doesn't explain the very interesting noises that we could hear through the wall," he breathed in her ear.

Clearly Max knew how to deal with men who forced their way into her personal space. Her left hand patted Gojyo's inner thigh before grabbing a small hunk of flesh beneath the pant leg and pinched. Gojyo jumped and scooted his chair back. Max removed her hand from his crotch and pulled back as she said, "I was scaring the shit out of the poor guy. He converts his fear into anger and either shouts, hits, or shoots. His gun was too far away and I was out of reach, so all he could do was yell at me. Unfortunately for him, I can yell louder." She grinned over at Sanzo and batted her eyelashes at him. Sanzo pointedly ignored her by burying his nose in his newspaper.

Gojyo smirked at the monk even though the other man wasn't looking at him. He was thoroughly impressed that this little lady was able to scare the normally stick-up-the-ass stiff monk. The previous day she had been able to intimidate their little fighting force, picking up Sanzo and dragging Hakkai along. She had been able to get her way quickly and effectively with a wit and an amazingly strong sense of self that Gojyo envied.

Max loaded up her plate nearly as high as Goku's and started to chow down. That was another interesting thing about her that he noticed the previous day: she ate a ton of food. She had loaded up their plates as if she was feeding them two meals, and she had cleaned her plate. Considering all of the acrobatics that she'd been able to do so effortlessly, plus that beautiful chi spell that Hakkai had envied, it wasn't too surprising that she was just as big a pig a Goku. At least Max had better manners.

"So, Gojyo, how did you sleep?" Max asked after swallowing a bite of food. Gojyo snagged a bite off of Goku's plate while the monkey wasn't looking before he answered.

"I slept pretty good," he said.

"So why were you having so many problems?" Max asked as if she hadn't heard his answer. "How late did you stay up?"

"I said I slept pretty good!" Gojyo said. "Why do you think that I had problems sleeping?"

"Because you lied," Max said simply. "Some lies I allow, but lies like this are pointless. Why did you have trouble sleeping? Was your bed uncomfortable?"

"I slept on the floor," Gojyo said.

Max leaned her head to the side and pinched the bridge of her nose the same way that she had the day before. "That isn't quite true. So…" she looked at him with a piercing gaze that was a little bit unnerving coming from such dark brown eyes. "…you can't levitate when you sleep. Did you sit on the floor and lean on the bed to sleep? That's pretty uncomfortable."

"How did you…?" Gojyo asked. Sanzo interrupted his question.

"She can read auras. Hakkai can learn something from her."

Hakkai stared at Sanzo with surprise, but Gojyo put his suggestive leer in place and said, "Aw, how cute! Somebody broke through the bastard monk's barriers and made him respect her. This is somebody I definitely want to go on a date with!"

Max rolled her eyes but Sanzo said, "She'd love to. Now scram."

"No," Max said.

"Yes," Sanzo said, although Gojyo found it funny how Sanzo wouldn't put down his paper. He got the feeling that if Sanzo did make eye contact with Max he would lose this battle of wills in the most disgraceful way possible.

Max quickly gobbled up the last three bites on her plate – Gojyo hadn't even seen her eat the rest – she was so fast – and grabbed Gojyo by his sleeve. "This is not a date, but I need to run. Come with me."

Gojyo felt himself being pulled to his feet and he started running in order to keep up with the short girl who was still pulling on him. They went outside where it was still raining and they just ran. They ran down random streets, Gojyo chasing Max. He didn't know when he started chasing her, but every time he lunged in to grab her she skipped out of his reach and turned down a side street. Eventually she led him into an alley that was blocked off with a brick wall. As Gojyo went to grab her she leapt up onto the wall. Gojyo just stared up at her, breathing hard. Was it just him, or was she not breathing? She wasn't gasping for air the way he was.

"Just so you know," he said between gasps, "this is a crappy date."

"I told you that it wasn't a date," Max replied calmly. "I wanted to talk to you about something."

"Talk? About what?"

"Sanzo and Hakkai," Max said as she settled herself on top of the stone wall. She looked as if she were sitting on the most comfortable throne. "I want to set them up with each other."

"What? Why? If they want to get together then they'll do it themselves," Gojyo said.

"Funny, I thought that you were more relationship-savvy than that," Max said with an evil look in her eye.

Gojyo cocked his head and looked up at the feisty little girl above him. "What are you thinking?" he asked.

"Hmm… I suppose I'm thinking that Sanzo is gay, not a virgin, and attracted to Hakkai. I'm thinking that although Sanzo is not a virgin he has very little experience in the sex and relationship departments, respectively. I'm thinking that Hakkai is attracted to Sanzo, but he had very limited sexual and relationship experiences, especially since he's only boinged that girl that Goku said committed suicide in front of him. I'm thinking that they both have a lot of emotional issues they need to get past, and they can probably help each other out with that. I'm thinking that they'd make a very attractive couple."

Gojyo felt himself agreeing with Max's assessment. He had noticed how the other two men eyed each other when they thought that no one was looking. He had actually envied Sanzo a little bit for attracting Hakkai's attentions. And then he thought about what a pretty pair the two of them made and he let go of his bitter emotions. "So what do you want to do?" he asked.

"Well, I'm not sure exactly… I just need your help to create a romantic atmosphere."

"Do you think that they would just sit down at a candlelit dinner without complaining about it or asking questions?" Gojyo asked.

"How did you know that I was thinking about a candlelit dinner?" Max asked. Then she shook her head dismissively. "Anyway, I have a plan. I figure that we can hang out here for a while together, and then go back to the inn acting all clingy like a couple. Then you can go around and plan a fancy shmancy dinner for two. Then you and I can get into a fight, and you'll dejectedly have Hakkai and Sanzo share the dinner. Voila! Insta-couple!"

"I think you're a little optimistic about this," Gojyo said, scratching his head. "What about that stupid monkey? He's attached to Sanzo like a good woman is stuck to me."

Max looked around. "I don't see any women stuck to you." Gojyo sneered and she chuckled a cute little laugh. "This was just a basic plan. When I have my fight with you I'll probably end it by storming off. I'll think of a reason to take Goku with me. It'll be public and humiliating, and I won't mean a word of what I'll say to you. If it all works out, you'll get to sleep in a bed tonight!"

That surprised Gojyo. "You're bribing me with sex?"

"Did I say anything about sex? Get your mind out of the gutter, please! You'll get to sleep in a bed and I'll take the floor. Or, more likely, you'll go to a bar after our 'fight' and pick up a woman. Or a man. Whatever." She shrugged and cocked her head to the side thoughtfully. "I swear there isn't a straight man in your whole group, except for Goku. He doesn't have a sex drive yet."

"You know, you're amazing," Gojyo said with a smile.

Surprisingly, Max didn't smile at the compliment. If anything, her lips tightened with what looked a little like irritation. "It's nice to know that you like what you see," she said dryly.

Gojyo's eyebrows snapped together and he made a face that he figured would look like it belonged on Sanzo's face. He'd hit a wall that he hadn't even seen coming, and that bugged the hell out of him. He may never have understood the men in his group, but he totally got women. This one was one wacked-out puzzle. "What'd I say wrong?" he asked gently.

With a subtly conscious effort Max smiled a gentle smile that looked genuine, like one of Hakkai's fake ones. It looked real, but you still knew that it wasn't. "You ask me no questions; I tell you no lies." She scooted backwards a little on the wall. "I'm sorry, but there are just some things I don't discuss with strangers. God, I sound like a little kid. 'Don't talk to strangers!'"

Gojyo smiled, understanding. There were things from his own past that he wouldn't want strangers to know about. Although, he suddenly had the urge to explain to Max about how his stepmother had beat him because he reminded her of his father's affair with a human woman. He wanted to confide in her the horror he'd felt when his full-demon half brother had killed his mother in order to protect a young Gojyo, how Jien had always been there to protect him, even sleeping with his own mother to keep Gojyo safe.

"You look like you're thinking something awful," Max said. "This world may be called Shangri-La, but you people here seem to be just as screwed up as the people where I'm from."

With a dry chuckle Gojyo walked up to the wall and jumped up, grabbing the edge of the wall and trying to pull himself up. Max leaned backward and fell off. A moment later he felt a strange tingling in his body as Max walked through him and the wall. Gojyo dropped down to the ground and spun around, just staring at the woman who could carry a man on his shoulder as if he were a huge stuffed animal, dance with the rain, and walk through walls. "I haven't touched the tip of the iceberg when I talk to you, have I?"

Max smiled demurely. "I'm afraid not."

"I'm never going to get laid by you either."

"I am sorry about that, but I do play a mean game of poker."

Oh, hell yes! "You got anything to bet?" he asked. Poker sounded like fun.

"Give me an hour. I'll have money," she said, taking his arm and pulling him out of the alleyway.

"What are you going to do, pick pockets?" he teased.

"No, I haven't picked pockets for money in, oh… maybe… thirteen and a half years? I haven't been that hard up for money since I was homeless. No, I'll do the other things I used to do to earn money after I realized that picking pockets really wasn't that lucrative."

"What's that?"

"I'll cheat people out of it!"

"What?"

"I'll stand at the corner, pick a target, and read their palms. I'll look at their hands, tell them what the lines and fingerprints mean based off of the rules I memorized when I was four, and tell them destinies that they want to hear using as much fortune cookie wisdom as I can throw in. If that doesn't work I can do the same thing with tarot card readings or have them play Find the Queen. I've noticed that those antics work better now that I'm not eight any more."

"Oh, do I hear you explaining a bit of your past to a stranger?" Gojyo teased.

"Shoot. Well, there's nothing to it, then. I'll describe a piece of my past to you if you describe a piece of your past to me. This'll even help me scream insults at you later."

"Gods help me; this'll be one hell of a fun afternoon!" Gojyo crowed with a laugh.

**VIII**

Goku stared at Gojyo in amazement and confusion. The tall redhead had come into their room, leaned on the door, and then flashed a triumphant grin at Max. It made no sense: hadn't they just been fighting?

Well, their behavior that whole afternoon had been strange. When they came back from town they had been laughing and talking as if they were best friends. It was as if they were on their own island and everybody around them didn't exist any more. Max had made sure to talk to Goku, but Gojyo barely even noticed the shorter man standing there. Then Max had pulled a book out of her pocket and had gone upstairs to read it, leaving Goku and Gojyo alone together.

"Geez, man, why are you acting so weird?" Goku had asked Gojyo in confusion.

Gojyo just grinned at him and said, "Shit, man, that babe can cheat the Gods out of their cash if she had the chance to play them in a poker game!"

"A woman after your own heart, huh?" Hakkai had asked from the stairway.

Gojyo had laughed and scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "Yeah, I guess so. You should have seen her! She had the whole bar going crazy, and she took the whole pot with an eight high card! She always won the pot, and it didn't matter what hand she had! It was great!"

"Remind me never to play Mahjong with her," Hakkai said with a soft chuckle.

"Actually, I don't think she knows Mahjong," Gojyo had said. Then he'd spotted a waitress in the dining room and had chased after her as she walked past. Goku had expected him to start sweet-talking her, but instead he asked if he could reserve a private table for two in a separate room. They'd walked off together, talking about flowers and candles and other gooey stuff like that.

A little bit later, after he and Hakkai had done the laundry, Goku went up to Sanzo's room and found Max lying on the bed, reading her book. Goku had watched her, thinking. The girls that Gojyo usually chased were a lot prettier with skinny waists and big boobs. This girl was pretty normal-looking. Goku thought she was pretty, but then again he thought that all girls were pretty.

"What's wrong, Goku?" Max asked without looking up from her book.

"Why is Gojyo acting so weird for you?" Goku asked. "You aren't like the other girls he's chased, and he never bought them anything more than sake. Why is he getting the waitresses to give him a private table and flowers and candles?"

Max had paled and looked at Goku as if she were scared. Then she'd carefully set her book down with a tissue between the pages where she'd been reading it and raced over to where Gojyo was sitting in the room next door. "What the hell are you doing?" she'd demanded, shouting louder than anybody Goku had ever heard. "Why are you making special reservations?"

"What? How the hell did you know about that?" Gojyo had asked. Then he looked over at Goku and said, "Why'd you tell her that, you stupid monkey?"

"Goku has nothing to do with this. Why did you make reservations for a date?" Max hissed angrily. She looked over at Hakkai, who was watching her yell at Gojyo with a very worried expression.

"I thought it would be nice to hang out with you without the others," Gojyo said defensively. "We had fun this afternoon, and I thought that this would just… I guess I was wrong."

"You guessed right," Max snapped. Her face had been completely blank – there was absolutely no emotion in it at all. Her eyes had a strange light in them, and it looked to Goku like she had a raging fire on the inside. Apparently Gojyo had thought the same thing because he had shrunk back a little bit and looked away.

"Fine, then. You don't have to go if you don't want to." His voice had sounded strange, as if there was something in his throat choking him. "Do whatever you want."

"Thank you oh-so-much! I will!" she shouted, and then she turned to Goku. "Would you teach me how to play Mahjong?" The way she said it sounded more like an order than a request, which was a lot like when Hakkai asked him to do something.

The look in her eyes had been very scary, though – much scarier than any expression Hakkai ever used. So Goku had said yes. That's what they'd been doing for maybe a half hour when Gojyo had come into the room and smiled at Max.

"Did you curl up into a ball and weep?" Max asked.

"Yes, I did," Gojyo said with a grin.

"Did you whimper and use the eye drops like I told you to?" she asked.

"Yes, I did," Gojyo said again.

"…And what did Hakkai say?"

"He reluctantly said that he would go down. Right now he's tracking down Sanzo to ask him." Gojyo's grin dimmed, but only a little bit. "Did you send Sanzo down to the bar?"

"I did that an hour ago when I was reading. I told him that I couldn't concentrate on my book with him reading his newspaper like an old geezer, so after me nagging for a while he just got up and left all by himself."

"Guys… what's going on?" Goku asked, confused.

Max giggled and ruffled his hair affectionately. "I forgot to ask you earlier, but did you know that Sanzo has a crush on Hakkai?"

"He does?" Goku asked. Then he thought about it for a second. "Yeah, I guess he does."

"Would you hate it if they became a couple?" she asked. "We just set them up on a date!"

"Oh… you're not fighting?" Goku asked.

Gojyo went and sat down at the table, grabbing Goku close in the process and choking him in the crook of his arm. "Stupid monkey, did you think that we'd really fight over dinner? Max is so much smarter than you, she'd never fight over something like that!"

"I wouldn't bet on that," Max said, looking at the two rows of tiles in front of her. She set them both down and asked, "Do I have anything good in here?"

"Why do you have two hands of Mahjong tiles?" Gojyo asked.

"Don't you need four to play Mahjong?" Max asked. "Either way, we figured that I'd learn to play twice as fast if I had twice as many hands."

"I thought you were smarter than that," Gojyo said. Goku hadn't believed Max when she'd said that earlier, either. But then again – and this was to never ever to be said to that pervy water sprite – Max really was much smarter than him. She had two really good hands, and she'd just learned the rules.

Just then Gojyo noticed which tiles Max had spread in front of her (note from author: I'm sorry, but I know absolutely nothing about Mahjong, so this part is lacking in details on purpose). There were two damn good hands. He whistled softly and leaned in closer to get a better look, dragging Goku with him.

"I think that you should let Goku go before he dies of asphyxia," Max teased as she picked up her book. Gojyo let Goku go. After he got his wind back Max said, "Anyway, you don't have any problems with Sanzo and Hakkai being a couple, do you?"

"No, I think it's great! Hakkai is like a mom!" Goku said.

Gojyo laughed loudly, "Don't let him hear you say that, monkey, or he'd kill you! Too bad I kind of agree with you, Monkey. There isn't a man alive who is as much a homebody as that poor little shit."

"I don't think so," Max said. "I'll bet that in his past life Hakkai was a strong man who led many, so now he feels comfortable taking care of the people he loves. He's got an old soul about the same age as yours. I'll bet you guys all knew each other years and years before you were all born… except Goku. He's the only original soul in your group."

"Original soul?" Goku asked.

Max glanced up from her book. "The other three are all reincarnates. You aren't. You are the original person to have that soul of yours. However, your soul is connected to theirs. I don't get it, and I really don't care, but the four of you are linked by a bond that transcends time and body."

"How can you tell that?" Gojyo asked.

Max shrugged. "It's all in your aura, there for any idiot who knows how to read it."

**Part IX**

Hakkai glanced surreptitiously at Sanzo across the table. The other man refused to look him in the eyes, almost as if he were embarrassed by something. Hakkai looked down at the white tablecloth, white candles, and flowers spread out before him and grimaced. "I thought Gojyo had a little more taste than this," he said.

"How did we get roped into eating here?" Sanzo asked through gritted teeth.

Hakkai blushed. After Max had yelled at Gojyo the redhead had seemed to implode. He had curled up in a little ball and wouldn't respond to anything Hakkai said for a long time. Eventually he'd said that since he'd already paid for everything, Hakkai and Sanzo should enjoy the free meal. "We couldn't let all this money go to waste," Hakkai said.

"Che. Gojyo can eat it all his own fucking self for I care!" Sanzo grouched. Hakkai noticed that despite what he said Sanzo didn't actually get up and leave.

"Oh, Sanzo," Hakkai said with a sigh.

"They set us up," Sanzo announced suddenly.

"What makes you say that?" Hakkai asked.

"It reeks of Max," the blond man said through gritted teeth.

"What does, Sanzo?"

"They're setting us up!"

"Why would Max want to set us up?" Hakkai asked. "I think you're a little paranoid."

Sanzo's purple eyes finally met Hakkai's, and what the brunette saw unnerved him a little. But what came out of Sanzo's mouth was completely shocking. "What's your sexual preference?"

"…Excuse me?"

Sanzo looked away as he said, "Max had me pegged just be looking at me."

Hakkai waited, but Sanzo didn't say anything else. So Hakkai asked, "What did she have you pegged as?"

"I'm gay," Sanzo said.

Well, that piece of news wasn't altogether surprising. What really surprised Hakkai was the fact that Sanzo even noticed other people. He had simply assumed that the monk just never cared enough about anyone to become attracted. "Max noticed right away?" he asked, impressed.

"She knows that you are human-turned-demon. But I want to know… are you attracted to men at all?"

"But Sanzo…"

"Answer the question, Hakkai."

Hakkai had to think for a minute. He'd never really noticed if he liked men before. "I'm not sure," he said seriously. "I'd have to say that the idea of sleeping with a man isn't completely off-putting. Why do you want to know, Sanzo?"

Sanzo's face flushed a little bit and Hakkai had his answer. "Oh, I see," he said with surprise.

"Max is trying to set us up," Sanzo said again. "She says we are compatible."

Hakkai watched as Sanzo kept avoiding eye contact. "Sanzo, why do you believe what Max said?" Normally the monk was so skeptical of people that he wouldn't act on anything they said. Something must have happened to convince Sanzo of Max's veracity.

He was right. "The little bitch can read auras," Sanzo snapped.

Hakkai felt himself pale. A master of aura-reading could read your whole life situation before you even greeted one another. She could tell when somebody lied, when they were happy, or even if they were standing next to their destined lover. Max was a delightful young woman to spend time with, but she was dangerous beyond belief.

Apparently she was quite manipulative, too.

"So, she and Gojyo spent the afternoon gambling so they could raise enough money to send the two of us out on a date," Hakkai said calmly. "Apparently she feels you and I belong together."

"It worked," Sanzo said simply.

"I don't know about that," Hakkai said calmly, taking a sip of water. "Now that we're both aware of the setup we can probably get them back somehow."

"I'll bet that she figured that we'd figure this out sometime during the meal. She's smart enough to plan it that way," Sanzo muttered as he took a bite of salmon.

"You think there's more to the plan than just setting us up on a date?" Hakkai asked, surprised.

"The hell if I know!" Sanzo snapped, startling the waitress who had come by just then to refill their drinks. Sanzo glared at the woman until she left. "I can't figure the broad out."

Hakkai smiled. "Oh, Sanzo." The other man was just plain cute when he was upset.

"Do you understand her at all?" Sanzo demanded.

It really impressed Hakkai that Sanzo's barriers had dropped. Normally any conversation with the monk turned out to be almost entirely one-sided. "I think she's like me," he said honestly.

"That bitch is nothing like you!" Sanzo snapped.

Hakkai shrugged. "Clearly she's more powerful than she looks. Yesterday she was in a bad mood, but today she's being quite friendly. She did arrange this date for us, using Gojyo to get us here. If anything, she's smarter than us."

Sanzo snorted. "She won Gojyo a lot of money at Poker. She's just like him on that, and she'd probably win in a fight against that stupid monkey."

"And as she proved yesterday she's a tougher hard-ass than you are. I'm not saying that she's just like me, but I suppose I see myself in her."

"You think she's had a dark past?" Sanzo asked skeptically.

Hakkai shrugged. "All four of us have tragic pasts, as well as most of the people we've met on this journey. She… oh, I don't know. I really can't get a good read on her. I like what she's shown me, and that is good enough."

"So you prefer girls," Sanzo said.

So they were back to that, were they? Hakkai hated this subject. When he had lived at the orphanage he'd caught some of the boys talking about how weird he'd been and laughed at him as they said he must like boys. "What I prefer… Why don't we talk about something else?" he asked a little desperately.

Sanzo's face turned very red. "Hey, I…" He was interrupted by something hitting his head.

"Don't screw up this opportunity, you selfish, prissy princess!" Max said from the doorway. She was wearing one slipper, the other being the thing that had hit Sanzo in the head. "Just tell the dense bastard that you like him and let him think it over!

"Go away you dumb bitch!" Sanzo yelled.

"Look who's the dumb bitch, you stupid asshole! You have to handle this delicately! I was stupid to think you could do this on your own!" She glanced at Hakkai and winked. The way her head was turned Sanzo couldn't see the little flick of her eyelid. Was this part of her plan? She was just going to push Sanzo into shooting her!

"Go the…"

"I mean it," Max said, her voice dropping into a low, cold, hard pitch. Sanzo and Hakkai both froze, looking at the short girl who now reeked of power. Her gaze was directed at Sanzo, pinning the blond with her stare. After a moment she turned to Hakkai and bowed politely. "I'm sorry I interfered with your love life. Please forgive me?"

Hakkai was floored. "Of course," he eventually stammered out.

"Please, finish your meal and enjoy yourselves. I'll be staying in the room with Goku and Gojyo, so don't worry about staying out too late, my darlings!" She winked flirtatiously at the two of them, her eyes sparkling.

"Dinner shouldn't take that long," Hakkai observed.

"I opened a tab at the bar for you," Max said. "Didn't Gojyo tell you?"

"No…" Hakkai said.

In the flash of an eye Max's other slipper was off her foot and thrown out the doorway. Gojyo yelped and there was a bang as he knocked into something. "Stupid male," Max snarled.

"Stupid female!" Gojyo shot back. "I forgot, okay! Pretending to be devastated is hard!"

Max stilled for a moment. Her hand drifted up to her chin and she stared into space thoughtfully. "I suppose it would be hard… I guess. I've never really thought about it before. Interesting." She shrugged, her eyes snapping to attention. "Anyway, you guys have fun. It's all paid for already, so even though this plan fell apart already you two should enjoy yourselves."

With that she left.

**Part X**

"Our plan is victorious!" I exclaimed once we were out of Hakkai and Sanzo's earshot. My fists pumped in the air triumphantly and I did an impromptu happy dance. Gojyo stood about ten feet away watching me.

"You think they'll be a couple now?" Goku asked.

"Not yet, but now they're free to talk about it!" I said.

"You planned for it to work that way?" Gojyo asked.

I stopped just as I reached the stairs and turned around to face the tall man. "'If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.' I originally planned to shoot Hakkai with a silver arrow of truth, which would force him to be honest with himself, but since he was willing to look at his feelings on his own I felt that it would be better… okay, it's just easier on my conscience if he figures it all out on his own."

"What?" Goku asked me in confusion. Gojyo looked just as confused.

I extended my left arm and Called my bow. My bow is beautifully and intricately carved ebony wood. It is five feet tall and heavy with a thick black string. When I call my bow I also call my black leather quiver onto my back. In the quiver are my ebony arrows as well as my magical silver arrows that pierced the heart with its own inner truth. They were just like my brother, Eros's, golden arrows of love and lead arrows of hate.

I knocked one of my silver arrows onto my bow and aimed it at Gojyo's heart. At the look of terror that Gojyo shot me I lowered my aim to the ground and pulled the arrow away from the bow. Then I held it out for him to see.

"The silver arrows of truth don't pierce the skin. They break the barriers to the heart, making the target face the truth within. It also has the power to neutralize the effects of the magical arrows for love and hate. Unfortunately, truth isn't gentle or easy. There's a shock to the system more often than not, so if the target can figure it out on their own I would prefer to let them do it that way."

"Geez, you sound like a military person talking about targets and not people," Gojyo said, stepping up close to me. I turned back around and we went up the stairs to the room we were staying in. I banished my bow and arrows as we walked so that I wouldn't scare any of the other patrons as we passed.

As we walked I shrugged. "It's easier to think of people as targets. If you take away a person's face it's easier to become emotionally detached and you don't have to worry about feelings or morality or ethics."

We reached the room and Gojyo opened the door for me. Goku entered behind me, which started Gojyo to ragging on the boy. I ignored them and pulled my book out of my pocket.

"What're you reading?" Goku asked, breaking off his fight with Gojyo.

"Porn," I said.

"What?" Gojyo asked as he leaned around to look at my book. "I didn't think you went for that kind of shit."

"Well, I suppose it isn't really porn. It's a trashy romance novel, though. Porn for women, according to my friend."

"You have friends?" Goku asked me in surprise. The fact that he was seriously asking if I really had friends made me snap my head up.

"Of course I do!" I said defensively. "If Paul or one of the Jonathans heard you say that they'd kick your ass so hard you'd have to sleep on your stomach for a month. They may be teddy bears, but they can pound me into the ground – metaphorically speaking, of course." In reality they can knock me out, acting together as Yin to my Yang.

"You're missing them," Gojyo observed.

I swallowed and tried to remove the sad look from my face. "They are my family. They aren't blood, but they're my family."

"They are very lucky to be with you," Gojyo said as he leaned in close to me.

I felt myself stiffen as I thought about my loved ones and the events of our lives. We always had fun performing musicals and goofing off during rehearsals, but my many positions and roles in the magical community often broke in and screwed with this happy part of my life. Just a month after I adopted Jason I was ambushed and beaten unconscious while the six-year-old was kidnapped. My Dance Troupe had performed for kings, acting as a distraction while the other Sages and I put a dangerous plan into action. My students have been attacked on a number of occasions in an attempt at drawing me into a trap, not to mention assassination attempts and people seeking to steal my power.

"I'm not entirely certain that association with me is always in my friends' best interests," I said softly. Then I smiled warmly at another memory: I had just met the man who had destroyed my life and not one of my friends would leave my side. "But they are good for my sanity."

Gojyo leaned in for a kiss, but stopped just before his lips touched mine. Then he pulled back. "Do you have a boyfriend?" he asked.

"I have a husband," I said softly. "No boyfriend on the side."

"I would never ask you to cheat, babe, but I'm surprised that you never mentioned your man."

"Don't call me babe," I said softly. I have plenty of pseudonyms, so I don't need other people making up nicknames – especially since Gojyo called all girls babe. "Normally I hold a policy when dealing with strangers: volunteer nothing. If people don't know details about my life and loved ones, they can't be threatened. It also keeps people at a safe distance away, emotionally."

"Why would you want that?" Gojyo asked. That's when I realized that the redhead was searching for love and acceptance, and my gentle rejection had actually hurt him very deeply. Seriously, why else would someone sleep around as much as he supposedly did (although throughout the entire Saiyuki, Saiyuki Reload and Saiyuki Reload: Gunlock series, you only actually saw him with a woman one time, according to Hai).

"My reactions when I loose things are… severe," I explained hesitantly. I had never explained this to anyone before. My family knew this about me from experience, so explanations were not necessary. "Here, I'll give you an example. When I was fourteen I had two… mentors, I suppose. Claire and Bartholomew were both Sages – Chief's fifth and sixth, respectively – and had treated me like a granddaughter since I received my first Call at the age of ten.

"We had gone to fight in a war on the side of one of our military friends. Their forces were weak and the mageborn unit had already been decimated in an earlier battle, so all six of us sages were there as the only support to the non-magic terran warriors.

"Things went badly. I sent Paul and the Jonathans to lead the terrans to a cave, which would let them escape. Claire, Barty, and I fought to give them a chance. We three fought against thousands of terran soldiers and a couple hundred warrior mages who were at the back of the ranks, like they usually are.

"Claire was a dance mage, even though she was eighty-three years old. Barty was an eighty-four year old defense mage that she was bonded and married to. The mages attacked as one, breaking through Barty's defenses and killing them both instantly. I watched it happen in slow motion. Then, when time sped back up, I released a wave of power, killing the entire enemy before me. I killed 3,500 people in 2.59 seconds."

Gojyo leaned backward and nearly fell over. "That's a lot of power," he said after a minute in a breathless voice.

"They were mentors," I said as if Gojyo hadn't said anything. "Imagine my reaction if someone more important to me was killed? That happened once and I went back in time, which is completely illegal by the way, and prevented the event. I don't want to overreact like that for someone I'm never going to see again. I'm not strong enough to survive those… ripples."

"I don't know… you seem fine to me," Gojyo said, wiggling his eyebrows in a weak attempt at humor. I gave him the benefit of the doubt and smiled.

"And I am a mighty fine woman, too. My husband has no complaints! Hell, he was singing me praises in front of my sex-goddess of a mother. Oh, and by the by, never ask a sex goddess a question about sex unless you want a lecture."

"Did that happen to you?" Gojyo asked. I rolled my eyes.

"I'd had the sex lecture a couple of times already from two different women and one man, but I had a question – just one question! Did sex hut the second time? It was a simple yes-or-no question that got Aphrodite – my mother – into a three-hour lecture which covered heterosexual sex, gay sex, and lesbian sex. In the end, the bitch never answered my fucking question!"

"You know, the second time…"

"I know," I interrupted. "I am a married woman. I have since discovered the answer for myself. That lecture just managed to put me off the idea of sex for over a decade, is all."

"And…?" Gojyo prompted.

"And what?" I asked innocently, knowing full well what he wanted to know but not willing to say anything. My sex life was none of his business.

"Did it hurt the second time?" Goku asked me. I had nearly forgotten that he was there.

I snorted. "Go to hell! I don't kiss and tell!"

Wow, that rhymed.

**Part XI**

"So… how did your date go?" I asked casually at breakfast the next morning. Sanzo glared bullets at me and Hakkai chuckled awkwardly. They'd come back to their room at a reasonable hour – I'd heard that – and had chatted for a long time afterward – Gojyo had heard that. The fact that they had been so chatty was good, and that Hakkai hadn't tried to bunk with us was even better.

However, neither one seemed to feel ready to call it a date yet. "Max, I wouldn't call that a date," Hakkai reprimanded gently. Sanzo nodded in agreement… kind of.

I shrugged, letting the issue drop. Then I changed my mind. "I'll suppose that the idea of an audience – aka Gojyo – listening through the wall can be a bit daunting, but it was only him doing that! Goku was snoring like a motor boat and I was busy trying to read."

"How do you try to read?" Hakkai asked me. He'd seen me reading my book the previous day, so he knew that I could read English (my book had been written by the brilliant Melanie Rawn and thereby had been in English).

"Ack, you sound like a teacher," I complained.

"I was a teacher," he said.

"Oh, me too!" I said brightly.

Unfortunately, my distraction tactic failed. "How do you try to read?" he insisted.

"Um…" I reached into my pocket and pulled out my compact, pointed the magnifying mirror at the table top and Called my math text and psych journal into being on the available surface. Hakkai picked up the textbook and started flipping through the pages, looking impressed. "I realize you can't read the titles, but one is a highly advanced mathematics textbook, and this other one is the latest psychology journal where some idiot published a new theory and didn't bother to explain things in a way that a sane person can understand. Okay, I'll admit that I belong in a loony bin, but that didn't make anything easier."

"What was the theory?" Hakkai asked.

"Eating spinach means you're depressed," I said sarcastically. Then I shrugged. "I still don't know. I was trying to read it last night, but couldn't because I was cussing out the author too much."

Goku laughed loudly, nearly spraying a rice ball over Gojyo. I covered his mouth before he could, though, receiving appreciative looks from the men at my table. The serving girl bounced up behind us and handed me a napkin as she giggled. "Wow, miss, you are very brave," she said.

I took the napkin gratefully and wiped my hand appreciatively. "No, I have some very blond moments." Then I looked from Sanzo – who is blond and excessively grouchy – to the waitress – who was blond with the biggest knockers I'd ever seen – and closed my trap with a snap. "Oops."

The waitress chuckled and patted my cheek. "It's okay, sweetheart. Would you like to order something else?"

I looked down at my empty plate, thinking. Then I looked at Hakkai's and Sanzo's, thinking that they had not eaten very much. "Hakkai would like some pancakes," I said. "Gojyo would like a few more sausages. Sanzo wants toast and waffles."

Sanzo glared daggers at me. "I do not."

"Oh, come on! You guys eat like birds!" I said. "You need to eat more or you're going to starve!"

"I don't want more!" Gojyo said loudly, which was quite the surprise, considering that a few moments before he had been fighting with Goku over every morsel of food that got put in their mouths.

"I don't get you people," I said as the serving woman walked off without writing anything on our ticket. "You're fighters, right?"

"Yes," Hakkai said.

"You travel around a lot on your journey, right?"

"Right," Gojyo confirmed as he threw an arm around the back of my chair.

I looked at the little white dragon that had settled on Hakkai's shoulder and smiled at the little tyke. Then I dragged my eyes back to the obnoxious males around me. "Then how come Goku is the only one with a healthy apatite?" I demanded. "Albeit he does go over the top eating everything in sight, but his hunger is mostly psychosomatic, probably from some sort of trauma he experienced where he was starved for long periods of time. I'm not suggesting that you guys eat quite that much, but you can stand to eat more."

"I wouldn't be one to talk, _sweetheart_, but you eat too much!" Gojyo said, mimicking the nickname that the waitress had given me. I ground my teeth. I don't like nicknames, but I tolerate them from strangers.

"I do not," I said calmly. "My body needs strength to withstand the demands I put on it. It has to be able to survive the drain of near-constant fighting using both magic and my mutant strength. It needs to withstand hours of grueling dance rehearsals, performances, acting, and singing, playing musical instruments, tumbling, tightrope walking, juggling knives, and anything else that I can possibly get it to do without giving out on me. If I didn't eat I would be a hollow shell, consumed by my inner power. You guys are all powerful, too. How can you not eat so much?"

Nobody answered. Eventually Sanzo asked, "Does your brother eat the way you do?"

"All of 'em do," I replied. "Everyone in My Dance Troupe does, too."

"Oh, you're in a dance troupe?" Hakkai asked, interested.

"Yeah," I said.

"What's it called?" he asked as he sipped some tea.

"… My Dance Troupe," I said, knowing full well exactly where this was going. It was a perpetual joke among my family.

"Yeah, what's it called?" Goku asked.

"My Dance Troupe," I repeated.

"Seriously, Max, what's the name?" Gojyo asked. He was getting a little annoyed.

I turned to Sanzo. He had it figured out already. "Sanzo, what's the name of the group I belong to?" I demanded.

He glared at me and answered into his coffee cup as he took a sip. "…My Dance Troupe."

I turned to Goku. "There you have it. MDT is the most prestigious performance group in my reality. Every single one of our performances we've put on since the year 2000 has been completely sold out, standing room only. We've had eight world tours, made nearly a dozen movies, and if it can be done on a stage, we've probably done it. Hell, I have to do a pole striptease when we perform _Rent_! My character's a stripper… Gojyo, don't look at me like that!"

"Sorry, _sweetheart_, but I'm absolutely in love with the idea of you stripping!"

I rolled my eyes up to the ceiling and stared at one of the light fixtures. The bulb had gone out. "Don't call me sweetheart, _stud muffin_, or I'm going to invent some decidedly embarrassing stories about you and tell them on street corners for money." He paled.

"What does your brother call you?" Sanzo asked. What was with him asking about my brother all of a sudden? It made me want to play with his mind, too, but I also wanted to protect myself. Ah… the tough decisions one must make in one's life!

"Which brother?" I asked. "I have… Okay, let's see…. Adam, Ben, Cal, Dan, Ethan, Frank, Gideon, Eros, and Pipse are my brothers who are still alive. Step brothers… that would be… Jake, Fred, Justin, Josh, Christopher, Christian, Cory, and… John Chap. Which one would you like me to tell you about?" As I spoke I realized that I was actually telling these men about myself. It didn't matter. Not only were they trustworthy, no one could get at my brothers from this dimension. They were safe. "That would be nine brothers and eight step brothers."

They just stared at me. I smiled and finished cleaning off my plate. Then I scooted my chair away from the table and stood. "My life is complicated, but it isn't here. I'd like to thank you for the lovely breakfast. I'll be out in town for a while today."

"Hey, Max, no running away!" Gojyo said, leaping up from his seat at the table.

Sanzo was a half a second behind him and Hakkai was following a close third. They reached out and touched me. My skin screamed from the contact and I tried to jump back, but for some reason four pairs of arms locked themselves around me, and I found myself drowning in agony that I hadn't truly felt since I was twelve years old.

**Part XII**

"LET GO, LET GO, LET GO!" I screamed, using my full voice. The guys let go of me and the pain dulled, but it didn't go away. Not even close. I took a few deep breaths to get control over my reactions. When I had smoothed my expression I opened my eyes and saw the four men that I had been staying with watching me. Goku, Gojyo and Hakkai regarded me with open concern. Sanzo glared at me out of the corner of his eye as he lit a cigarette – feigning nonchalance – but I could see the worry in his aura.

I took a deep breath and smiled, ignoring the brief stab of pain I felt in my back. "Sorry, guys. When you touched me it felt like I was being stabbed all over." I looked around to apologize to the other diner-goers, but they weren't there. Actually, the diner wasn't there. What was there, though, was the institute that Paul and I owned. "How the hell did we get here?" I asked in shock.

"Where the hell are we?" Gojyo asked. He sounded irritated.

"Now, now, Gojyo, I'm sure there's a perfectly reasonable explanation for our presence," Hakkai said. I noticed that he and Sanzo were standing very close together. It was so cute!

Suddenly my brother Frank, in full drag – he and his husband are queens at a bar in LA – stuck his head out of my window. The Gipson Institute is only two stories high, but to accommodate a high ceiling for the library and the stage room the whole first floor is three stories high. As a result, the second floor is on level with the fourth floor of a normal building. I guess to people who had never seen the Institute on its busy days would think that it was a mansion. It's actually a big house… surrounded by two dormitories, a huge barn and a parking lot sized garage.

"Max, who're your friends?" Frank shouted. A couple of students who were on their way from the dorms to the main house paused and stared at us.

"Janine, Damian, are you going inside?" I asked politely.

"Sorry, Miss Dealer," Janine said in her thick Scandinavian accent. "Your brother distracted us when he shouted."

I smiled. "Just go about your business. I'm going to go up there and kill him."

"Why? He's being cute," Janine said with a laugh. Damian didn't seem to think the same as his girlfriend. He seemed to be a little put out by my flame of a brother.

"He's in my room without permission," I said. We turned to go inside. I tried to deposit Sanzo, Hakkai, Gojyo, and Goku in the stage room, but they wouldn't hear of it. While I was in there, my husband noticed my presence. He looked happy to see me, like he always does, but then his smile dropped into a concerned frown. I gave up on my argument with the others with a sigh and ducked out of the room as JP headed toward me. I went to the stairs and started heading up.

It is a grand spiral staircase… it is about six feet wide and makes one giant circle going up. It also happens to go up to the second floor without any landings or places to rest. I was perfectly fine when I got up to the second floor. The guys with me, however, were a bit out of breath. Some adventurers, to get all out of breath after a few steps…

Once we were up to the second floor I glanced in the direction of my room. Adam was casually hanging onto the doorknob as if he was just hanging out, watching the others in my room. I snickered. "I guess everyone decided to ransack my room," I muttered. "Hi Adam!"

"Yo, sis, what's up?" He said casually.

I didn't say anything as I passed him. I stopped just inside my room and took in the scene before me. Troy, Jason, Gideon, and Ben each had one hand on the handle of two drawers of either my desk or my filing cabinet. Cal was stuck to my closet door. Ethan and Frank's husband, Greg, both had their hands stuck to the drawers of my nightstands. Frank was attached to the window. Dan was glued to the trapdoor in the floor, and Paul was stuck to the hidden door that led to the secret passage between Troy's and my rooms. I raised my hand to cover my giggle. All eyes turned to stare accusingly at me.

"I see you're all having fun breaking into my room," I observed casually.

"Release us!" Troy ordered. I shot him a strong look and he blushed. "Please?" he added.

My lips quirked up evilly. "How long have I been gone?" I asked seriously after a minute of tension. All of the stuck men in my room sagged in relief.

"Two nights," Adam said from behind me.

I nodded. "That sounds about right. I've been in the Saiyuki reality for that long," I announced. Hai and JP popped their heads in from behind me at that point. Hai smiled hugely at the Sanzo party, but didn't make a move. Gensomaden Saiyuki was his favorite anime, from what he's told me.

I concentrated briefly and all at once everyone dropped their arms from my furniture. "Damn it, guys, now I'm going to have to reset my traps!"

That's when I caught a blonde blur. I picked Jason up, even though he's eleven years old, and held him tightly. He had a little separation anxiety. In the five years since I took him in he's been kidnapped several times and I'd nearly died several more. The way I see it, he's earned the right to hold me tight, no matter that it caused the pain I was feeling to intensify. I could handle it.

"Mom, are you okay?" he asked, sounding needy.

"Yeah, sweetie, I'm fine. I'm sorry I scared you."

"Mom, are you sure?" Troy asked.

"Of course I'm sure!" I snapped, but I held my arm open for him. He hesitantly came over and allowed me to hug him. I was impressed. In two years he'd only allowed me to hug him a few times.

"Mom, you are the coolest!" Hai said. He grabbed Goku and started dragging him to his room. When Goku fought him and swung a fist to make him let go, Hai just turned into the ball of light that is his true form.

"Hai, ask him if he wants to hang out with you!" I scolded. "Don't drag him!"

Hai returned to his human form and nodded forlornly. I sighed, but decided to officially introduce my new friends to my family.

"Listen up, y'all. These are Sanzo, Gojyo, Hakkai, and Goku. They're my friends. Don't be too rough on them!"

"Forget them," JP said softly from behind me. "You're in pain."

"I know," I said. It wasn't as if I could forget pain. I could function normally despite it, but I could never actually ignore it. I don't work that way.

JP placed his hand on my shoulder, and of course the pain intensified. He felt my muscles stiffen. "Put Jason down and go to bed," was the doctor's order.

"I'm not tired," I said, but I hugged Jason tightly and set him on the ground.

"I need to examine you. What caused the pain?"

"Honey…"

"Shut up. When did the pain start?"

I said nothing.

"When did the pain start?" He was getting annoyed.

*You told me not to say anything,* I said using open telepathy so that everyone in the room could hear me. *It isn't wise to disobey my healer.*

"GOOD GOD WOMAN! Knock it off or I swear to god I'm going to kill you! JK will help me."

"Paul will, too," JK chimed in. "Either way, let your hubby have his way so that he doesn't antagonize me, will you?"

"He won't antagonize you," I said. JK got that look in his eyes that said he was seeing the future and he was right. "Fine, I'll be good. Everyone, get out."

Nobody moved. I sighed in irritation.

"Seriously, everyone…"

"We have been worried shitless, sis," Gideon said seriously. "It's been two days, and you haven't contacted us once, the way you usually do. Your phone hasn't answered, and it receives signal EVERYWHERE. Hell, even the Sage's Link hasn't worked. I was so scared that you were killed! Jonathan doesn't strip you down or anything, so we're staying here through your exam."

I sighed. "Fine, you can have my body."

**Part XIII**

Hakkai had watched as Max's husband had healed her. The man with sandy brown hair and light brown eyes had been very thorough and remarkably gentle after the rough words he had said before. He had eased Max's pain and then forced her to drink a sleeping potion. Apparently he had decided that it was Max's own power that had caused the dimensional rift that she and Hakkai's friends had come through, and one of the side effects of using so much power at once was sometimes intense pain. Hakkai understood: he had felt the pain of chi drain many times.

However, everyone else's reactions were strange. Their brows had furrowed in confusion and they had exchanged worried looks with each other. "I'm sorry, but this is unusual?" Hakkai asked.

"Max is very powerful," the one called Paul had said quietly. "She's also used to draining herself to exhaustion. Sometimes she'll get sores from too much power passing through her skin in one spot, but otherwise she's normally fine until she passes out. She may be a freak, but this is weird for her."

"I wouldn't say she's a freak," Hakkai said gently. Paul's eyes snapped over to him, sparkling with amusement.

"She is a freak. She'll tell you so herself if you ask her."

"Who else would switch bodies with her male best friend just so that she could run around shirtless and piss on the side of a house," JK said.

"Who else will visit Frank at the drag club with the prince of the elves and a few select others in this room disguised as drag queens," Gideon said.

"Who else would return a castration knife and box of condoms that her sex goddess of a mother had given her as a wedding present and threaten to cut a scar into the goddess's face?" JP said.

"My daughter did all of that," a deep voice said from the doorway. Everyone turned and an elderly, wrinkled man with sparkling water-blue eyes stepped into the room. "Why doesn't it surprise me that she brought home some new friends?"

"Because she's always doing it?" JP said with irritation. "No offense, guys, but she's constantly bringing people here, as if they were cats. Hell, we have sixty students this year, many of whom could count as strays."

"No offense taken," Hakkai said with one of his fake laughs. Several of the men who looked like Max turned to look at him in alarm, as if his chuckles had bothered them. He felt his smile disappear, and he noticed that the others visibly relaxed.

"As we explain the complexities of truthsaying to the noobs, why don't we leave Max to get some sleep?" JP said. Everybody stealthily headed toward the door and down the stairs.

"Hakkai, I'm afraid that I'm going to have to ask you to only smile when you feel like it," Max's father said, taking the green-eyed man aside once they reached the room with the stage. "My children take after their mom. She was a truthsayer, and our children inherited her gifts. Also, I would recommend that all of you be careful what you say. My children inherited my perfect memory and will not hesitate to throw your words back in your face when you least want them to."

"You make us sound as if we're diseased," one of the triplets said as he grabbed his father around the shoulders. "Anyway, we're about to start the rehearsal. What should we do about Max's part?"

"I'll do it," a short girl with long black hair and tanned skin said. "I'm short enough to play cub Nala and pretty enough to pull off adult Nala…"

"And you aren't the least bit humble about it, are you Desiree?" another girl who looked a lot like the first one said. How many sets twins were there in this group? Hakkai suddenly wished that Max was right there to ask.

Hakkai started when he saw a long rectangle of floor start to drop away. He turned to the wall to see the youngest of Max's brothers working a crank in a recessed section of wall. A row of seats rose from under the ground, the wood floor replacing itself underneath the seats. With a quick flick of the wrist Gideon closed the little cover over the crank. It was as if there was nothing there except wall.

The four of them sat in the seats. Goku looked closely at the floor as if he were afraid that it would collapse beneath him, but Hakkai only saw a beautiful, intricate design carved into the wood.

In the very center of the large room a spiral started, and it radiated outward in tight circles all the way to the room's corners. In a perfect circle around the spiral five more spirals started, their rays intersecting first with the original spiral and then with each other. Each spiral was a lighter color than the wood of the floor, as if another floor had been set above the darker one and had been sanded down until the intricate spiral pattern had emerged, perfectly smooth as if it were all a single piece of wood. If one didn't look very closely it just looked like normal flooring, but in fact it was so beautifully intricate.

Actually, the whole room was like that. Along one wall were floor to ceiling windows – well, nearly floor to ceiling windows because they came down to about two feet above the floor, and rose to about two feet below the ceiling – which were covered with thick black velvet curtains. In between the windows were wooden posts that had been carved with spirals, leading up to warm wooden phoenix gargoyles, from whose wings hung the drapes. Upon closer inspection, the curtains were embroidered the most beautiful, intricate designs in black thread which looked very similar to the pattern of the floor. There were more wooden posts on the opposite wall, but because that was an indoor wall there were no windows.

The stage, however, was obviously ornate. The front was covered with large drawers and cupboards, each one carved with unique and intricate designs. Goku had tried to open one, pulling his hardest, but it had been locked. Having seen the men in Max's room earlier, Hakkai suspected that they were magically wielded shut, only able to open when the lock was triggered in the correct way. The large, black velvet curtains probably had similar designs stitched into them that the drapes had, but Hakkai had been unable to go up and look at them. He had the feeling that this was probably the safest room to be in during an attack.

Despite all of the intricate carvings and designs of the stage, the room itself, and the floor, the room did not look gaudy in the slightest. It looked tastefully decorated. To see most of the intricacies, one would have to look very closely. Aside from the stage, it all looked so simple and elegant.

The lights dimmed as Hakkai studied the room, so he turned his attention to the stage. The curtain opened while the room was dark, but as a young woman shouted words in a foreign language the lights came on in a dazzling moment, shocking the green-eyed healer. He and his companions were thrown into a foreign kingdom of animals. He was thoroughly impressed with the singing, dancing, acting, and the costumes were amazing. Then he heard the opening of a song that he had heard before.

"I see you have heard this song before," the young man wearing a dress said. He had a smile on his face and his eyes twinkled in the darkness very much like his father's seemed to. "Judging by your openmouthed reaction, I would say that my cute little sister performed the Water Dance on you."

"How did you know that, sir?" Hakkai asked in amazement.

The man chuckled. "My sister… I know her very well. She must trust you and your friends very much; otherwise she would not have brought you here. I believe that for the first time in several years, she has found some friends who have managed to crawl under her skin. How very interesting!"

"She doesn't bring people here very often?" Hakkai asked. He felt something brush his arm and he turned to see Sanzo watching him. His arm moved slightly on the arm rest and Hakkai felt it brush against his arm again.

"I think your boyfriend wants to hold your hand," Max's brother said.

"He isn't my boyfriend… um…"

"I'm Frank," he said. "He really likes you, though."

"I know," Hakkai mumbled. He hadn't thought that Frank would be able to hear him, but apparently the other man was used to this type of environment.

"If you know, then why don't you try him out? If you allow yourself to explore the possibilities you'll figure out your feelings just that much sooner."

Hakkai thought about this for a moment, but ultimately rejected Frank's idea. "I think I'm going to need to think about this for a little bit."

"God, you sound like Max!" Frank said with a knowing smile. "It wasn't until Ben and I stopped telling her that Jon was perfect for her before she figured it out on her own. I realize that she's a genius and all, but in the romance category she's a bumbling idiot. Well… I suppose that's not quite true since when she makes up her mind she knows how to get what she wants, but it took her… oh… at least four years before she made up her mind to reject Paul and marry JP. My baby sis can be so irrational at times!"

"It seems that she and I are very similar."

"It would seem so," Frank admitted. "So… why don't you hold the blonde's hand? It would make him happy."

Since he couldn't think of a reason not to, Hakkai reached over and gently covered Sanzo's hand with his own.

**Part XIV**

Sanzo was elated. Hakkai had grabbed his hand! He'd been talking to the drag queen, and whatever the guy had said made Hakkai blush and tentatively grab his hand. Not wanting to freak Hakkai out, Sanzo didn't react at first. Then he slowly turned his hand over and wrapped his fingers around Hakkai's.

He was so elated that he missed most of the musical. At first he had been irritated that he was even watching this pile-o-crap, but after a while he found that he was enjoying himself despite his reservations. Whatever. Hakkai was holding his hand and he was in heaven.

The musical eventually ended climactically and the curtain closed. The lights came on and Goku was immediately running up to the stage and climbing onto it.

"Get down!" Sanzo shouted. Goku looked over and Sanzo with big puppy dog eyes. Sanzo strode over to him, pulling his large white fan – called a harisen – out of his sleeve and smacked the monkey a good one on the back of his head. "Get down, or I'm going to shoot you and…"

Something hit the back of Sanzo's head gently. It stung a little, but it didn't really hurt. He turned and saw the biggest man he had ever seen standing behind him, super-buff arms crossed, blue eyes glinting with what appeared to be suppressed hatred. Sanzo – one of the highest ranking monks on his world, who traveled with the three most powerful demons on a quest given to them by the merciful goddess to destroy evil – found himself cowering in this man's dominating presence.

"Oh, calm down, Drathmül! He's not actually picking a fight," a lanky guy with sandy blond hair and gray eyes said. "He views it more as punishing a child than anything else."

"Paul, aren't you, like, not supposed to read peoples' minds?" the one called Desiree asked flirtatiously. He found it strange that she had her arm around another young woman's waist, as if that were a natural position to be standing in.

"He's not reading their minds, sweetheart, he's just 'keeping tabs on their emotions.'" The girl with Desiree said with a snicker. "He doesn't need to be able to read their minds, anyway. We can take them if we have to." The funny thing was: the vibrato in the young woman's voice did not sound fake. She honestly thought that she and Desiree could take them.

"Yeah, right!" Goku said, jumping off the stage.

"Yeah. Right." The short boy with golden skin had stepped up behind Sanzo so quietly that the taller man had jumped when he heard his voice. His tone was firm, but not hostile. The glitter in his eyes looked amused.

"We are…" Gojyo began, but a willowy girl with amazing brown hair interrupted him. She had a slight accent that Sanzo couldn't place.

"We know who you are," she said gently. "We think that the thirty-one of us could take you. Most of us are only human, after all!"

"Lupe, do you think that maybe we should ban the Bayshulls and the Sages from the fight? Let Drathmül be the mage of our group. I mean, we all know a few chi spells if we have to. It feels like if we have the mages we're cheating or something." The speaker was the loudmouth who had played Zazu in the musical. Sanzo recognized the voice, even if the accent was different now.

"Jose, I couldn't agree with you more!" Lupe said, grinning evilly as she spread her hands. A chi ball formed in between them. Sanzo looked around, and all of the humans of the group had created chi balls as well. They were also all smiling the same grin that Lupe had on her face.

"Oh, knock it off, you guys. What are you going to do if they actually attack you? That spell only creates a ball of light. You'd be screwed and I'd be stuck gluing you back together again," Max's voice rang out from the doorway. "God, you'd think that these people had nothing better to do than intimidate strangers all day!"

All the chi balls disappeared as everyone turned to look at Max. She was bedraggled and rubbing the sleep out of her eyes, but she was awake and smiling at everyone in the room.

"Shouldn't she still be asleep?" Hakkai asked. Sanzo thought of the tall glass of powdery-white sleep potion that the short girl had drunk with a grimace. That was enough potion to knock a normal person out for a couple of days. Why was Max awake now?

"Max is very powerful, as I'm sure you know already," the one called Paul said, his arms crossed in front of him. "Her magic naturally neutralizes the effects of sleep aids and other tranquilizers, so enough potion to make me sleep soundly for a month only knocks her out for two hours. Not that she normally sleeps more than a few hours in a night on her own…"

"Anyway, I feel much better now," Max said. She stepped fully into the room, the three boys who had called her Mom following behind her. There were more teenagers behind them, and Sanzo suddenly remembered their discussion over breakfast and how Max had said that she was a teacher.

"Dang, woman, how many kids do you have?" Gojyo asked as everyone filed in. More rows of seats were raised and everyone took a seat. More adults filed into the room and Max easily leapt onto the stage. It looked easy, as if she just walked up a small step instead of leaping three feet into the air.

"Three are mine," Max said, indicating the three teenagers who looked nothing like one another. "The other sixty-five are my students. This is a school of magic. Paul is the headmaster and I am the assistant headmistress."

"They look nothing like you," Goku said, as indelicate as ever. He got right into the oldest boy's face, looking him over in fascination. The boy gave Goku a feral look, as if he wanted to rip Goku to shreds. Max pulled Goku away from the boy as if she handled situations like these every day.

"Jason," she pointed at the little blond boy who was probably a little over ten years old, "is the youngest son of one of my sisters. Her husband is a minister and dead set against magic. Jason's sisters and brother can handle the ban, but Jason is autistic. His magic was out of control, and with the ban his mother would not do anything to fix the problem. I took him in when I was sixteen and he was six.

"Hai," she indicated the Asian-looking boy who was in his early teens "is an energy entity who took a corporeal form for the experience. I guess that technically he is billions of years old, but he's only been with me for four years. Legally, he is fourteen years old.

"Troy," this was the feral teen, "was in the foster care system two years ago. He hadn't actually done anything, but his attitude was a serious problem. He scared the crap out of the magical foster parents, and naturally, since he is half vampire, a quarter demon and a quarter human, non-magical ones were out of the question. I gave him the option of being adopted here. As it turns out, this is the first place he's ever been able to fit in, and he's actually softened considerably."

"You have a very unique family," Hakkai noted softly. Max chuckled softly, but her eyes watched Gojyo closely. Gojyo was a half breed – half human and half demon. He'd never fit into either world at home and he had a lot of sympathy for others who shared similar heritages.

"Most of my students are mixed breeds. This school specializes in training the powers and abilities of students who do not fit in any of the traditional schools of magic. The students are actually very much like I was when I was their age, and we are prepared to deal with some of their… unique issues I suppose would be a good phrase to describe it."

"What about the humans?" Hakkai asked, eyeing the one called Lupe suspiciously. The harlot smiled back sweetly and waved. Sanzo's heart sang when Hakkai took a half step closer to Sanzo and changed his gaze so that it fixed on Max instead.

"They know a couple of spells that don't actually require magic. Most of it is little stuff meant to threaten and intimidate, but won't actually do harm, like those balls of light earlier. Of course, they all know the chant to turn people into stone, too. I don't like my friends to be completely defenseless. My life is too hazardous for that."

"Max, the kids are settling," the tall one with silver-blond hair said from below the stage. Max looked down and smiled warmly.

"Thanks, Jon. I'll start now."

With that the lights went out. There was a brief squeal from some of the girls, but everyone quieted immediately. Once all was silent the lights gradually brightened, and all attention was on Max.

**Part XV**

"Hi, I'm Max and I'm a mageborn," Max said loudly, her voice carrying clearly to the very back of the huge stage room.

The adults all smiled and said lamely in unison, "Hi, Max." Some of the students snickered, but most of them just rolled their eyes.

Gojyo, however, couldn't keep his eyes off of Max. He found himself captivated. She was a mixed breed. She'd said something before about it, but he hadn't been paying attention at the time. Now he was. She was like him, and so were most of her students. She was like him, and yet she was able to do all of this with her life. It was purely amazing.

"I have a few announcements to make before we get down to business," Max said. Anybody else would have to shout to make their voices heard in a room this size, but Max simply spoke and the sound filled the large space easily. What she had said before about being able to outshout anyone was clearly not an empty boast.

"I want everyone to know that we adults have noticed the practical jokes war that you students have started. I will only warn you once: this is not a can of worms you want to open. We adults are older and more mature. We have seen a lot more of the known universe than you and we have much more experience under our belts. If this continues, we will give retribution and we are much cleverer than your pathetic whoopee cushion spells. Got it? Cease this stupidity immediately.

"Now: on with the lesson. How do you guys feel that you're doing in your classes?" Max asked. There was a general rumble among the students that sounded somewhat positive. "I hate to break it to you, but you are all doing very well, actually. Now I think it is time to start learning how to apply what you are learning to real situations. You all know several different attack and defense spells. You are aware of several different magical cultures and species, different laws and different styles of government. The question is: how do you apply what you've learned to real life?

"In a fight there is attack and defend: action and reaction. In an argument there is action and reaction. It doesn't mater what species you are or what kind of magic you use. This is always the case. That's why today I'm going to teach you how to dance."

Everybody looked confused, and Gojyo felt that the leap between fighting and arguing to dancing made absolutely no sense. Of course, Max was watching the confusion calmly, as if she had expected it. After a few moments she started speaking again and the room quieted for her.

"What dancing teaches us is to watch the other person for what they are going to do, and then respond accordingly. Of course in a fight the appropriate response is hostile and designed to bring you one step closer to protecting yourself and defeating your opponent, but a dance is designed so that you work with your partner to provide entertainment. Also, a lot of diplomatic business is conducted during parties, where there will be dancing. Knowing how to dance also improves coordination, body memory, and grace and makes you better at fighting, sports, and ice skating. This week we'll be learning some basic Earth social dances and next week we'll be learning some from the diplomatic hubs besides Earth. Today, we'll start with the boring one: the waltz."

The following hour was torture for Gojyo. Not only was it bad because Max paired up the genders so that boys danced with boys and girls danced with girls. She said it was so that everybody got equal practice leading and following. Then she taught the basic step to the whole room and everyone practiced it. There was much tripping and stumbling to be had while everyone figured out what they were supposed to be doing. About halfway through the lesson Max had everyone switch roles so that the followers were now leading.

That wasn't the problem. Gojyo had been paired up with Goku. That was the problem. Gojyo had glanced repetitively over and Sanzo happily dancing with Hakkai. At least that couple seemed to be enjoying themselves. For once Gojyo actually envied Sanzo. Dancing with his best friend would be better than dancing with the stupid monkey. Hell, anything would be better than dancing with the stupid monkey!

After an hour of stumbling around, Max called the lesson to an end. She and the one called Paul stood together on the stage, posed as if they were ready to start dance, which of course they did when the music started in a fast three.

The swirling dance that they performed put the Water Dance to shame. This dance wasn't as impressive as the other one had been because the steps themselves were all easy and recognizable as the steps that they had just learned. However, they turned and swirled and spun in ways that made a person think of grace and beauty and sex on legs, especially when Paul twirled Max around so fast that her skirt spread and Gojyo got a good look at the black body suit that Max wore under her costume.

Then suddenly the tender of the dance changed. There was still spinning and turning, but now both Max and Paul had daggers in their hands, and in addition to the spinning and turning there was now a good amount of thrusting and parrying. Finally, with an amazing crescent kick Max forced Paul to step back and she swiftly placed the blade of her dagger at Paul's throat, just as the music ended. Paul held himself perfectly still for a moment, as did everyone else in the room. There was no doubt that her knife was sharp with the way that the light glinted off of the diamond edge. Then Max pulled the knife away and everyone applauded. Max curtsied and Paul bowed, dismissing the class with the motion.

Max stepped off the stage and landed gracefully on the ground. Goku ran up to her, gushing about how great that dance had been. Max smiled and listened to him before she brushed him off gently and moved toward Gojyo, who couldn't help but stare.

That was when suddenly Max's fist rammed into his stomach, forcing him to double over in pain. Something went whizzing over his head and stuck in the side of the stage. Then Max threw something glittery and white back. Gojyo looked up at the thing that had just passed over him and froze. It was an angry-looking throwing knife.

Gojyo turned and stared. A tall, thin woman with straight raven hair and absolutely no curves was pinned to a wall, Max's knife sticking through the cloth of her right armpit attaching her to the wooden doorframe. Gojyo turned back to Max, who looked calm as if nothing had happened.

"If you want Troy back, Ruhal, then you're screwed again," Max said casually. "I've adopted him. He's mine now."

"He is a Vampire! He should be with his clan!" Ruhal said menacingly. It sounded like an old argument was being revisited.

"The vampire clans don't like mixed breeds and refused to take him before. He has Zhanva teaching him the Clan ways, so he won't be completely corrupted by the human," Max said calmly, a small feral smile touching her mouth. "Don't touch what's mine."

With that, the other woman ripped away from the wall and flew at Max almost too fast for Gojyo's eyes to follow. Max used the same move as before – a crescent kick followed by a neat slice toward the neck – and had the other woman frozen in place instantly. Then the vampire disappeared.

"What the hell was that?" Sanzo demanded on behalf of the four comrades.

"Vampires are very Clannish, when it suits them. It's frowned upon to sleep with someone who isn't in your clan, and if the union produces offspring the whole family is cast out, but if that mixed offspring is being sheltered and taught a way that isn't of the clan, then the child is taken back. The child is then abused and neglected, told that it is crap and not worth the blood in its veins while it is taught the ways of the clan. As long as Troy went from foster home to foster home he was fine where he was. When I adopted him and accepted him and his scars, then the Clan suddenly wanted him back."

Gojyo found it strange the way Max spoke. When the vampire had spoken, the emphasis was on Vampire. When Max spoke, the emphasis was on Clan. That's when he realized it: all of the people that he and the others had met so far were all part of Max's family. They were her clan. The students were probably temporary, honorary members not privileged to all of the inner secrets of the group, but they all received the equal protection of their leader, Max. Troy was a part of that group and Max would fight to keep him there.

"Where does Troy want to be?" Hakkai asked softly, as if he were curious and not worried about Troy's feelings.

"I had a talk with him before I started the adoption process," Max said. "I said that I would only adopt him if he wanted me to adopt him. That would mean that I would accept him for him, including all of the scars he carried on his back and he would accept me and all of the scars I carried on my back. I told him that when the vampires found out they would come after him and I would fight them to keep him here. I made sure he knew that if he did not want this then he was completely free to decline my offer. Needless to say he accepted and now he has a life that he loves. I'd say he is finally in the place he wants to be."

For one brief moment, Gojyo wished that he was Troy and got to live here with Max, too.

**Part XVI**

Goku was very happy. He'd seen a great show, then he'd eaten a great meal with a whole bunch of great people, and he'd helped Max wash the dishes. Apparently everybody helped out with meals one meal every week, and Wednesday was Max's day. She'd done dishes every Wednesday at dinner for years, she said. Even though Aunt Martha and Aunt Josephine said that she didn't have to anymore (apparently Max paid them for their time and provided the cooking stuff) she still helped out whenever she was there.

After dinner a doorbell rang, and the big burly guy answered the door. He spoke quietly with Max, and she whispered something back to him. Drathmül went to the door and brought the two people outside into the big room across the hall from the stage room. Max had then excused herself and went into that other room, but she didn't close the door all the way. Goku went up to it and peeked.

"What are you doing, monkey?" Gojyo said from behind Goku, startling him.

"Shut up you pervy water sprite! Max is in there with two people and I want to know what they're saying!" Goku hissed.

"Goku, I'm sure that Max wouldn't want us to eavesdrop on her private conversations. We should just go back into the other room and wait until she's finished." Hakkai said. Sanzo had followed closely behind Hakkai, acting all lovey-dovey. Goku was fine with it: he wasn't getting hit by the big white fan.

"Did Max leave the door cracked?" the one called Paul asked, startling everyone. They all turned around in surprise. How could a simple human sneak up on three demons like that? It was actually quiet in the stage room. My Dance Troupe had already left for the evening and the students were all in the dormitories doing homework and stuff.

"Yeah," Goku answered, a little confused.

"I'm keeping tabs on her conversation telepathically, but if you want to listen in then go ahead. Just don't get caught. I don't think it would go well if the Terrans found out that their conversation wasn't private," Paul said seriously. Then he turned to leave.

Goku called him back. "What's a Terran?"

"It's a person with no magical ability at all," Paul said, turning back at the doorway. "Sanzo is human, but he isn't a terran. There are humans who are mageborn and there are humans who are immortal. Terrans are anybody – demons, humans, elves, whatever – who are born mortal without magic."

Oh. Goku and the others turned back to the door, listening hard. Paul sat down on the floor a ways down the hall and closed his eyes. He looked like Sanzo did when he was meditating.

"I'm sorry to bother you at home, Max, but I wanted to talk to you about something without Starr being present," the man said. "It's about some disturbing intelligence that we heard in Russia."

"What do you think I did?" Max asked. She didn't sound even the little bit worried about what the other two people had to say. Actually, she sounded like she was having fun.

"We heard a rumor that you saved the president of Russia from mutant invaders and got him on board a Russian submarine," the woman said. "You managed to get in and out of the official residence without the mutants even being aware of your presence, and you got the president to a submarine that was half a world away and submerged a thousand feet."

"I never set foot on a submarine!" Max said calmly. "I'm claustrophobic."

"But Russian intelligence found your fingerprints inside the president's bedroom, where he was being held captive," the man said.

"It couldn't have been my fingerprints. Every time I morph my fingerprints change because the cells re-grow in different orders. Fingerprints are not like DNA which is set in stone." Max really was enjoying the argument.

"We also have intelligence reports that say a young woman was in Japan, meeting with a young man of the press. Part of the meeting was videotaped from across the street, and the reporter was wearing a wire. They discussed vampires and something called the Sages before the equipment malfunctioned." The man was accusing Max of something, but Goku wasn't sure what. Either way, he didn't like the man's tone. "We even have pictures."

He handed a folder to Max, who opened it and looked inside. Then she closed it and set it on the desk that she was leaning on. That's when Goku realized that Max and the others were in a huge classroom, with Max leaning on the teacher's desk in front of a big whiteboard.

"That person looks nothing like me," Max said. "It could have been anyone."

"But you can morph," the woman said. "We don't recognize her from any other intelligence we've ever received. The surveillance equipment all malfunctioned at the same time, when you mentioned that you were fed up with being secretly recorded."

"Come on, Allie, have you ever heard me complain about the mini cassette player that Mike keeps in his pocket whenever you two have questions for me? It's never malfunctioned in my presence and I know I certainly have never tampered with it. I can hardly get my computer to work let alone my DVD player. How can I have the expertise to mess up two electronic devices?"

"Your friends from MDT are always willing to step to your defense," Allie said.

"Honey, I can pop anywhere in the world by myself, and I can take any number of people with me as long as they have similar abilities to mine, but I can't transport multiple people with no powers without draining myself. If what you say is true, I would have had to bring my brother Gideon, our Tech Wizard who is not a mutant, with me and drain my reserves, waste more energy morphing and sitting through what looks like an exhausting meeting and then take us both home. The only thing I would be able to do for days after that much drain would be to sleep. I haven't taken a sick day from my life in… oh… twelve weeks I'd guess. The timestamp on that picture was two weeks ago." Max smiled. "What else do you want to ask me about? I still don't see anything here that's particularly bad."

"What about Saudi Arabia, Iran, Kazakhstan, and India?" Mike asked as he handed more files over. Max looked at them briefly before setting them on in a pile on the desk behind her.

"What's wrong in those countries?" she asked. "I don't understand the files."

"You met with leaders in the governments of each of those countries," Allie explained calmly. "Not much is known about those conversations, but key words were picked up: power, demons, brooms, and elementals."

There was a long pause before Max pointed at Mike and asked, "Are you guys on a witch hunt? Is that why you guys keep bothering me?"

"Look, we know that in the past Nostradamus was able to predict the future…" the woman started before Max cut her off.

"Nostradamus's prophecies are a bunch of cryptic crap that can be applied to any situation. Pick a different prophet – one who supplies clear and precise details like names and dates – and I'll bother arguing with you about the validity of the craft."

"Max, you always make it sound as if we're talking about the religion," Mike said. "I'm talking about true-to-life witches and wizards."

"Have you been able to sense any true-to-life witches and wizards with your next-gen technology?" Max asked accusatorily. Neither Mike nor Allie reacted. "I'm going to take that as a no."

"But a couple of years ago when you answered that distress call from another planet with the other Morphers, we saw the footage of that. You can't possibly tell me that you were able to do all of that with only your mutant powers and a few morphs! That was magic. Real magic. Why can't you trust us?"

Max shrugged, but she looked a little irritated. "Why can't you trust me? You ask me to help you on jobs. I defend this country and this planet from the mutant and human threat of war. I saved this country and this planet from alien slugs eight years ago. The president owes me three favors, for crying out loud! How come every time there is a murder case that goes cold I find myself arrested? Seriously, there's too much paperwork involved in killing people."

The two humans sighed, but gave up. "I wish that you could talk to us and tell us what you've seen," Allie said in defeat.

"I don't think that's a good idea," Max said. "My bad days would make one hell of a horror movie. Anyway, would you like some tea or coffee before you leave? Isn't it a two hour drive to Area Twelve?"

"How do you know where Area Twelve is?" Allie asked just as Mike demanded, "How do you know that Area Twelve exists?"

"Just after I became a Morpher, Gideon and the other Morphers got caught on Area Twelve when they heard that you people had found a spaceship. The officer who had been sent to interrogate them was an old friend of Dad's, so we got the first call. I answered the phone and impersonated Monique's voice. Then I promised to contact the parents of the other Morphers. I stole my dad's bus and drove as Monique and picked everyone up, using a couple of mannequins in the bus to look like the other parents. Then I drove everyone home. Gideon was able to sneak back into his room, but Monique had noticed that I was missing along with her wallet and keys. Because I couldn't explain why I had been out for a joyride on the family bus, I was grounded for a month. Gideon still owes me for taking the rap for that one."

"You are a very remarkable woman," Mike said.

Max ushered them out the door. Goku and the others managed to escape into the stage room, but Max stopped them in the hallway right next to the door, so he could still hear Max's response.

"Well, I don't consider myself a woman. I'm not a girl, either. I'm something in the middle, but there really isn't a word for that."

"Shemale!" Paul shouted from his spot in the hallway. Max laughed.

"Seriously, you've got three levels for males: boys, guys, and men. Guys range from thirteen to thirty, depending on psychological development and mental age. Girls should have that middle-ground, too!"

"Goodbye, humans!" Paul called as Max walked the man and woman to the door. Without missing a beat – and without turning around – Max flicked him off.

Once the humans were gone, Max pulled Goku into a gentle hug. "How did you like the show?"

"You're very smart," Goku said into her shoulder. He was kind of surprised that Max was shorter than him by a few centimeters. For some reason she always seemed so much taller.

"Yeah, well, you have to be in order to come up with perfectly logical reasons why you weren't in all of those places at those times when you really were, and still not lie once. Over the years, I've gotten pretty good at it."

**Part XVII**

It was time to let go, but I didn't want to. Sanzo, Gojyo, Goku, and Hakkai needed to go back to their reality – I could feel the time-space continuum starting to right itself. They would be spit back to where they'd come from with or without my help, but if I opened the portal for them they would have a guaranteed safe return.

So why didn't I want them to leave? Why had I brought them here in the first place? I wasn't attracted to anyone – as much as Gojyo dearly wanted to sleep with me. Goku annoyed me, Sanzo was too easy to tease, and Hakkai was too fake. Why the hell did I want them by my side? I'd never even watched their show!

Anyway, it was time to let them go. I dragged them out to a small clearing in my forest. I had bled there once, so nothing would ever grow here. Aside from the dirt, it was a pretty little alcove that I spent a lot of time meditating in.

There was much grumbling to be had, but I waited for them to quiet down. Naturally, that didn't work on Goku. He just kept blathering and antagonizing Gojyo, so I forced his eyes to meet mine by staring at him until he turned his head. Paul once said that my stare is like a laser setting fire to the back of my target's head and it feels like evil spirits are cursing him with the force of the universe helping them out. Apparently Goku is immune to all that pain because it was a little while before he turned toward me.

"I want to thank you guys for visiting," I said quietly. "I'm going to send you back now."

"Why?" Gojyo demanded.

"I don't want to go!" Goku shouted, as if saying it loud made it so we had to listen to him or something.

Sanzo and Hakkai just stared in surprise. They were searching my face for answers. I could guess what the questions were.

"I had no purpose," I said awkwardly. "I had no real reason to be there in your world, and there is no reason for you to be here. You are needed back home, so I'm going to send you back."

Everyone seemed to accept my reasoning, except for one.

"I don't want to go," Gojyo announced.

"I don't care," I said coldly. "You can't stay here."

"Who says I can't?"

"I did," I retorted. "You're going to be naturally expelled from this dimension soon, whether you like it or not. This way is easier on your body. You'll want to be healthy for the ladies in your dimension, don't you?"

"Who says I'll want anything to do with them?" Gojyo asked. "I want you to accept me here! Accept me! I love you and I want to spend as much time as I can with you!"

There was no way in hell that I was going to admit that I mirrored those sentiments. It was so much fun to watch the four of them interact with one another! Unfortunately, this was more important to me than having fun with my new friends. "There isn't that much time," I said gently, "and this way I get to say goodbye."

"Why wouldn't you be able to say goodbye?" Hakkai asked.

"I don't know exactly when you'll be gone," I said softly. "I can feel that you'll be gone soon, but I can't tell you when. This way I'll keep things under my control."

"Control freak!" Paul shouted from somewhere in the trees.

"Will you quit following me around?" I demanded with genuine irritation.

"Hey, when the Greek goddess of wisdom and war tells me to keep an eye on you, I obey her. She'd fillet me and serve me to the Aztec gods for the hell of it."

"She would not!" I said indignantly. "Aztec gods only eat beating hearts. GO away!" I turned back to the Sanzo party and sighed. "Seriously, if Athena wasn't my mentor, I'd seriously try and kill her. She's a goddess, though, so… what can you do?"

"You're on speaking terms with the gods?" Sanzo asked. He was a high-ranking monk, so it made sense that knowing gods would be within the realm of his interests.

"It's not the gods you worship," I said. "These guys are all waaaay past their prime. When I said that I was the daughter of a sex goddess, I wasn't kidding. She's a bitch."

I looked from one surprised face to another and decided to crack one last joke. I shifted into my goddess form quickly and suddenly. My hair grew down to my lower back and turned red – not orange, not a brownish red, but _red_. My face thinned and my eyes widened, turning greener than a crayon and more luminescent than a glow-stick. My coloring also changed – it paled. Boobs, hips, and butt grew and reshaped while my waist shrank. I grew taller, too, so I didn't look as warmed and misshapen as a Barbie. I also changed my clothes to a clichéd glittery blue dress with a low neckline and a slit up my left leg (if I had made it red it would have probably clashed with my hair).

All this change happened in an instant and without any warning. I smiled with red lips – I had no need for makeup in this form – and Gojyo nearly fainted. I pulled him to me in a hug, but by the time his chest touched mine I had shifted back to my normal/favorite form – 5'3" tall, jaw-length dark brown wavy hair, light olive skin with spots and freckles in random and strange places, not-quite chubby yet definitely not thin, hourglass figure and small round face. I came up to Gojyo's shoulder at best.

He held me close for a long time. Eventually I pulled away and placed my hand on a tree. It started to glow, indicating that I had effectively activated the interdimensional portal. I stepped aside and looked at Gojyo and the others one last time.

"I'm going to miss you guys," I said before they walked through the portal and returned to their home without me.


End file.
